Was a family function (not my family) recently.Overheard conversation between husband & wife in their 30s. Both professional working people.
Man "I'd like to buy a drink. Can I have some money please?"
He got it and brought the change back.
Maybe, I'm easily shocked, but I was. Thought it was so demeaning for him.
No,it does not seem more demeaning because the man asked. However, I thought it smacked of a tipping of the forelock and a degree of servility. Maybe, my sense of personal dignity was offended.
did he actually say
//"I'd like to buy a drink. Can I have some money please?" //
word for word? -seems a bit stilted -' I'll get the drinks in -have you got some money' is something you will hear a lot of -my OH carries a small amount of cash but, as i have a love of large handbags, I tend to carry a purse full of cash and he has the cards. In another situation I would say -can I have your card I need to buy some groceries -not demeaning what so ever. maybe it was the tone of the sentence rather than the content that offended you?
If we'r going l never carry cash s himself has to pay for drinks all night. I don't feel demeaned, why do I want the bother of going up the bar? If we're further afield I ALWAYS have cab fare home in my pocket, that's not touched.
I think it's a sign of the times and a good one too. Why should the onus always be on the men to buy the drinks. If I go out with my bloke, whoever has the money pays for them. Since I'm a bit clumsy and forgetful it's usually him that ends up going to the bar, but no-one bats an eyelid when I give him a few quid out of my purse. I work more hours than him, ergo I have a little more money.