The switchboard operator in Truro Royal Cornwall received a call at a little past two in the morning from a somewhat inebriated man who wanted to know what time the hotel bar opened.
"At eleven a.m., Sir, I think - but this is the Treliske Hospital that you have called," she replied.
At three-thirty A. M. the phone rang again and the same man, this time obviously feeling no pain, asked the same question.
"Not until eleven a.m., I think, and I have told you already that this is the Treliske Hospital not Mannings Hotel," she said a second time.
At five-fifteen, the hospital switchboard operator received still another call from the same guy, now completely stoned. Once again he asked the same question.
More than a little irritated, she snapped, "I told you, sir, you'll have to wait until eleven A. M. to get in the bar, that's my best guess when it opens and, once again, by the way, this is the fecking hospital."
"Get in, hell," croaked the drunk, "I want to get out of the damn place and check in with you as I have a liver biopsy at midday!"