Would You Say Something?

[missprim]

I know this should probably be over in pets, but I would like a general opinion and not necessarily a dog lovers opinion.
One of my neighbours has two dogs. One is a lively little terrier she's had for a few years and the other is an old dog she's had from a pup.
Last time I saw her old dog I thought perhaps she was coming to the end of her life, but yesterday when I saw her I was shocked.
The poor dog seems to be three times fatter than when I last saw her,and her back legs just seem to have gone and she can hardly stand.
Her eyes look so sad and she almost looks blind.
When I mentioned to my friend that her dog wasn't looking too good, she agreed with me, but I couldn't bring myself to say perhaps it might be kinder to have her put to sleep.
Would you have said anything if you were me?

[LoftyLottie]

Actually, I have kept elderly animals who have partially lost their sight, got unsteady on their legs and various other things. I have let them live on until they stop eating and drinking and wagging their tales. I think when the time is right, dementia or not, your neighbour will probably know. I would never keep an animal who is suffering alive. An elderly animal who is winding down and losing its faculties isn't necessarily unhappy. They do not worry about their condition.

I think I err on the side of NOX. Keep an eye on things.

[missprim]

NOX this is why I am asking for advice. I have no intention of calling the RSPCA or interfering in any way that would cause distress to my friend.
I simply want to know how I can make sure that the dog isn't suffering, as to me I think she is, I can see it in her eyes and in her demeanor.

[LoftyLottie]

It sounds as if is just the normal sort of elderly behaviour rather than dementia as such. It is not unusual for elderly people to keep asking the same question. Often then have very, very bad short term memories. Is she able to cook for herself, keep her house relatively clean etc. Have the dogs got food and water. Perhaps the lively little terrier is suffering more than the elderly dog if he is not getting any walks. Has she had a medical diagnosis of dementia?

[missprim]

Thanks Lottie, you have been very helpful in helping me to understand. Next time I pop over the road I will ask my friend about the dogs eating and drinking habits and take more notice of whether or not the dog seems happy enough.

[LoftyLottie]

I would just pop over as much as is practical for you. That will benefit her and the dogs. You obviously are a good friend to her.

[NOX]

I know you are a nice person missprim and not intending any harm whatsoever, but like Lottie I am ( usually, not always) in favour of letting old lives tick themselves away unless the animal is in pain. Old things do wind down, sometimes they gain weight, sometimes they lose weight, they go deaf, blind, become incontinent and many other things which distress people who see them. That does not necessarily mean from their perspective they have no quality of life. My old wolfhound was blind and deaf and very unsteady on his legs, suffered from vestibular attacks and generally looked awful, but I knew him and knew him to be happy just very decrepit. He died peacefully and happily on his sofa in the comfort of his own home. I know some people would have considered a blind and largely deaf dog to be suffering, I personally don't view it that way as it's a gradual process and one which they become gradually acclimatised to.
If you would like to help your friend, offer to take the old dog on a very short walk, she may have simply gained weight because she's lacking exercise and take it from there, but try to be gentle about any suggestion that the dog has reached it's end, as you might finds it's human companion thinks differently.

[missprim]

Lottie our posts crossed there. Yes she has been diagnosed and has medication, but unfortunately she doesn't always remember to take it. I think perhaps she doesn't cook much as although the dog is getting fatter, my friend is getting thinner as I sometimes thinks she forgets to eat also.Her little dog seems ok as he runs around the garden a lot and I have no worries for him at all.

[LoftyLottie]

It seems as if they are getting old together Miss Prim. You can't do more than keep an eye on them all, and you obviously do.

[missprim]

Thanks for that NOX, you have brought tears to my eyes telling me about your dog, and now I can't see what I'm typing!
I would offer to take her dog for a walk but when I was round there last night I'm not joking, the dog couldn't get up onto her feet and was just shuffling around and this as well as the look in her eyes just made me think she was suffering.
I have taken on board all your advice and will just keep an eye on things and perhaps my own instincts will tell me the right things to say if I feel I need too say something and I will go about it very carefully.

[ladybirder]

the dog couldnt get up onto her feet and was just shuffling around and this as well as the look in her eyes just made me think she was suffering

I think this old lady is not in a position, through no fault of her own, to make a proper assessment of her dog's health. This poor animal should see a vet and let him make a recommendation as to the best course to take and to see if and how badly it is suffering. Quite how you achieve this I don't know, but I would start by voicing my concerns to her vet who hopefully knows her and the animal. Or go through her family. But I couldn't stand by and do nothing if I thought it was suffering not do I think you should. Call it interfering if you like but I tell you if I get to your friend's age and have dementia I hope to goodness there is a sensible person keeping an eye on my animals and would not let them suffer. Good on you missprim.

[missprim]

Thanks ladybirder, I think my best bet would be to talk to her daughter and ask her if she thinks it would be best for the dog to see the vet. I've thought about how I will say this and hope I can pull it off without her thinking I'm interfering. I just hope she is in agreement.

[ladybirder]

Oh good, I'm sure you'll find the right thing to say and I hope they take it in the spirit it is meant. Please let us know how you get on, I shall be wondering:-)

[chaptazbru]

Totally 100% agree with ladybirder.

[Connemmara]

Once the back legs go - they are dying.