Diet

[marval]

I've decided to make money writing dieting books.
I'm told they appeal to a very wide audience.


To gain weight, takeaway Pizza. To lose weight, take away Pizza.


I've nearly finished the pills the doctor gave me to stop me from being so greedy.
I want some more.


My mate bet me ten pounds I couldn't come up with a good Vegetarian joke.
I had a few, but gave him the money there and then.
They were all to Quorny.


I've just started at slimming world and it's brilliant, you're allowed 15 sins a day.
I've been doing gluttony and sloth today.


I got kicked out of fat fighters today.
Apparently it’s not the British equivalent to sumo wrestling!


I was out on my first date with someone from work and they asked "are you more of a cat or dog person"?
'As long as there's some tomato sauce I'll eat anything!' I replied.


Diets.
They're for people who are thick and tired of it.


Define irony?
Small doors at McDonald's.


Second day of my diet. I've lost seven pounds.
I'm gutted; I was going to buy a kebab with that.

[Playbill]

Let me be the first to congratulate you for giving me a laugh. :)

[starone]

I love this because I have been dieting (weight watchers). I am going to send a couple to my daughter who is also dieting. Good ones marval

[Svejk]

Made me wobble,too.

[jim360]

More wordplay delights -- I look forward to these snippets when they come out. Your originals?

[pizza]

Well said marval

[flump1]

Love them Marval xx

[greeneyedmonster]

Love the one about Slimming World...I think that's where I was going wrong!

[ZorroX]

I can't help you in all issues, but here http://www.shoppharmacycounter.com/
you can read a lot about diet pills