The Gifted Octopus
A guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the
octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the bar that
this is a very talented octopus. So talented that he can play
any musical instrument in the world.
He hears everyone in the crowd laughing at him, calling him an
idiot, etc. So he says that he will wager £50 to anyone who has
an instrument that the octopus can't play.
A guy walks up with a guitar and sets it beside the octopus.
The octopus starts playing better than Jimi Hendrix, just
rippin' it up. So the man pays up his £50.
Another guy walks up with a trumpet. The octopus plays the
trumpet better than Dizzy Gillespie. So the man pays up his £50.
Then a Scotsman walks up with bagpipes. He sits them down and
the octopus fumbles with it for a minute and sets it down
with a confused look.
"Ha!" the Scot says. "Can't you play it?"
The octopus looks up at him and says, "Play it? I'm going to
screw it as soon as I figure out how to get its pajamas off."