Coping With A Break Up

[dyli795]

i'm 61 years old, lost my dad 4 years ago ,he was my biggest influence and i was so much like him.and it seemed since then ,i have pushed my husband of 13 years away emotionally. also my mum is now dying and there is also a family feud going on which is very bitter. all in all i have taken things out on my hubby and even though i wish he would understand the reasons and work through it, he has moved out and wont consider trying again. i have no one to talk to about all this and i dont want to burden my grown up chidren as they have their on problems. ireally have no one to open up to . im still hoping my husband will change his mind but in the meantime i'm in a bad place. any kind of advice would be much appreciated.

[boxtops]

Dyli, I'm sorry to hear your story, you are having a very tough time of it.
You say you don't want to talk to your children, but can you not do so? This is what families are for, to support in the hard times. They lost their granddad, they must be hurting too to see their mum and dad splitting up, and about to lose their gran. Call a family meeting - I would.

[ummmm]

You won't be a burden on your children. I'm sure they'd hate the thought that you are suffering in silence.

[andy-hughes]

I totally sympethise with your situation.

If all you need is someone to talk to, which greatly assists in getting your thoughts in order, then The Samaritans are perfect. they will listen without judgement, and help you with support at any time of the day or night - 08457 90 90 90.

If however, you want to try and resolve the family issues, i would reach out to your children, and gain some support from them, and hopefully start to resolve at least some of the issues that are causing you so much pain.

[Old_Geezer]

Do talk to your children. If they were in such a situation you'd want them to unburden themselves by speaking to you wouldn't you ? One needs to be able to talk thing out, it helps.

Try to stay out of the family feud if possible. Your health isn't worth the stress. You have but the one life, don't cause it to have more problems than necessary. It's bad for your health.

Try to take each day at at time. You need to accept & cope with your mother's sitation. I assume your husband knows you regret pushing him away and knows you would be happy if you could renew your relationship. So that bit is in his court, his decision, leave it with him.

Remember that when times seem dark, nothing ever stays the same. Things were good once and the cycle will come around and be good again at some point. Just have to hang in there until it does.

[dyli795]

thanks everyone who took the time to give me advice. some of what you all said helped.

[murraymints]

Sorry to hear this....you must talk to those close to you...perhaps you could have some kind of mediation where you and husband talk it out with a third party there to guide you....CAB can give you telephone numbers....good luck xx