Agree with New Judge absolutely. You do nobody , including yourself, by not turning up to tell the truth.
In theory, and occasionally in practice, the CPS can compel you to attend. It should never come to that, for your sake and for all women's. I once had a case where the victim was gay; this is to illustrate the principle; and the defendants were relying on his being too frightened to attend. They thought that he wouldn't pursue because that would all come out. I had him arrested in Newcastle and brought overnight to court in London. When the defendants knew, and saw, that he was present under arrest, they instantly changed their pleas to guilty. You cannot allow bullies to get away with it