Spectator N0. 2679 : Choc-A-Block By Doc
Crosswords1 min ago
This is probably going to sound silly,but I welcome any opinions,even if to tell me I am being daft!
My boyfriends 7 yr old child stays with us on weekends and hols.She is very very clingy,follows him everywhere,even to the toilet and waits outside.I never say a word,but there is one things that I dont like.
Every morning she comes in and climbs in nxt to him and snuggle up as close she can get.Now we both sleep naked,so firstly im not sure whether to tell him that he really should be wearing boxers now she is this age.But the main prob is what she does - she runs her fingers thru his hair,drags her nails slowly down his back,traces her fingers over his face and lips - infact she caresses him like I would do - and Im his lover!! He is half asleep and not even aware really fo what she is doing,but I lay there watching this and it just doesnt look right.She has never ever seen me do this so she is not copying.But I dont think she should be acting in this way - it just looks wrong.
What do you all think?
No best answer has yet been selected by kazzianne. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Awww i think it's sweet, she obviously adores her daddy, and perhaps is still very confused that he's not around the other 5 days of the week? I've no doubt that as she gets older this will wear off and before you know it she'll turn into every other kid, i.e, grumpy, surly and will only grunt when spoken to.
I would however suggest that your boyfriend at least wears boxers in bed, I think 7 is a little old for a child to see someone naked of the opposite sex, plus (and I hate to sound horrible here.....) but if he's only half awake when she strokes his hair etc, it might have a ummm involuntary reaction from him???
I can see why you dont like it. I think I agree with Boo in the boxers and distraction.
I think you're right not saying anything, see is obviously missing him and maybe copying behaviour she's seen on tele as a way of getting closer. So other than mentioning the fact that now that she's older you think you both should wear night clothes when she's around, just encourage him to give her lots of attention and hope it wears of.
Hi dancecaller - that was a lovely reply.I havent told my partner that I think this behaviour is worrying me,and I think that he would be cross if I mentioned it.But I am going to ask him to wear boxers definitely.
When I say he doesnt react,he does actually have his arm round her so that they are facing each other,and he is sort of stroking her back(god this sounds bad) so can you see how it looks to me? I know she is only 7 but it really looks wrong.I sound daft dont I !
Undercocers - thankyou for taking the time to write you reply.
I do spend time alone with her - we do lots of things such as baking,drawing etc.And the rest of the time we all do family stuff.I dont truly think she is jealous of me - she calls me mummy number 2.She has always done this from the first day I met her.And if she was 2 or 3 I wouldnt be bothered in the slightest,but as she is 7(and a very big 7) it just seems a bit strange.
Its so hard to know where to draw the line. Some cultures are more touchy-feely than we are.
I know my 7 yr old was very cuddly until I started wondering if I (her mum) was enjoying it too much, so discouraged her slightly. Then wondering if I'd been wrong.
As far as the boxers go, it might feel less like a critisism if you said you thought you should both wear night clothes when she's around
Best of luck