Scottish Language Lesson

[maggiebee]

Is a dove a doo Dad
Is a doo a dove
Is a cow a coo Dad
A sparrow jist a spyug
And is a wall a waw Dad
Is a dog a dug
She's gonnae warm ma ear Dad
Instead o' skelp ma lug.

Ma teacher's awfy posh Dad
She changes aw oor names
Wee Shuggie now is Hugh Dad
And Jimmy's ayeways James
Ah'm scunnered wi' it aw Dad
The way she shoogles words
Ah must be glaickit no 'tae ken
That feathered friends are burds.

Ye learnt me aw wrong Dad
Ye cawd a ball a baw
Your wife is now my Mother
You said it wis ma Maw
Ah'm no share hoo tae spell Dad
Ah'll niver pass ma test
Whit is this ah'm wearin' Dad
A simmet or a vest?

Ah gave ma nose a dicht Dad
When it began tae dreep
She gave me sich a fricht Dad
Ah near fall aff ma seat
Haven't you a handkerchief
She roared as if in pain
No, ah jist yase ma sleeve, Miss
And wiped ma nose again.

Ah cawd a mouse a moose Dad
Ah shid hiv held ma tongue
That's manure oan yir bits Dad
Nae longer is it dung
It's turnips and potatoes
No tatties noo and neeps
She said I've ripped my trousers
When ah'd only torn ma breeks.

There's twa words fir awthin' Dad
They're jumbled in ma heed
Hoo kin I be well bred Dad
When ah keep sayin' breed
Now is a crow a craw Dad
Is a bull a bull
A'll try tae get it richt Dad
I will, I will, ah wull

[Zacs-Master]

As good a reason for independence as any you could care to mention.

[askyourgran]

That is good maggiebee. I'm just as bad with the Irish I need an interpreter, a man came to me in a supermarket last Saturday and asked if I knew if they sold 'souffle' I was so embarrassed because I couldn't understand him. I saw him a bit later at the checkout with a bag of Stir Fry.

[quinie]

Great stuff,maggiebee. I bought the book and I've heard the author reciting this particular poem.

[Calibax]

.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzV4Ui3iG8E

[quinie]

Thanks,Calibax.

[maggiebee]

Great Calibax, never heard it sung before, thanks.

[Wharton]

Zacs-Master - Have you ever seen a green dug? :-)

[Wharton]

Brick 1 - Whit ye greetin fur?
Brick 2 - Ma maw's awa.

[shoota]

Are ye awak the neet Wart?

[Wharton]

I was once called a bestud by an English chap. I took it as a compliment until it was explained to me what the bastard was actually trying to say.

[cupid04]

Have you named the wee fluff balls yet, pal? Sorry I can only do estuary English:-)

[shoota]

What had you been doing to him?

[Wharton]

shoota lad - naethin ava like, ken?