You are absolutely entitled to be angry Gness, I would jolly well be angry in your shoes. I do hope this discussion doesn't keep you awake tonight, please think of the lovely memories you have of being together. xx
Having also seen the filthy conditions in Leicester General in 1997 when my Mum was in there, I thoroughly sympathise. Rolls of dust under the beds, dirty tissues littering the floor, bed sores developing after only TWO days due to neglect and later when Mum was finally getting better I saw ward toilets so disgustingly dirty that my Mum couldn't bear to sit on the seat. She told us she asked for bleach and some cloths to clean it herself when she could barely stand up, she had been so ill. The lady in the next bed died while we were visiting one night and we had to endure the sounds of muffled undignified laughter behind the thin dividing curtain, from two nurses, larking around, getting the poor lady ready to transfer her to the mortuary.
I have hundreds of tales to tell from the 3 months spent visiting .........It was so grim in there. I do hope things have improved since those days but I sincerely hope I never end up in there to find out.
I think DT was only trying to help by being so indignant about your husbands care, that he felt you should report the matter even all these years later.
Hugs to you Gness. xx