My sister and I wrote a sitcom episode and entered it into the BBC's competition to find a new series. We were included in the last 13 entrants and were invited to the BBC to meet sitcom writers and hear their advice. We had to lie about our ages just to be considered, since the BBC are renowned for ageism in writers.
The hallowed Geoffrey Perkins, RIP, was surly and rude to everybody. As it turns out, he probably had a hangover.
The writers' talks were brilliant and I'm glad that I got to meet John Sullivan and Paul Mayhew Archer, who now has Parkinson's Disease. Just to be in the presence of Graham Linehan, (who was very modest and stayed to listen to other more established writers), was an inspiration.
However, we had to keep re-writing and re-writing our original idea, until it was ruined and resembled 'a BBC sitcom'. We and all the other competitors got the impression that the BBC wanted something along the lines of 'Friends', that they could sell to America and make a packet. So why choose the ideas that they did? The overall winner was a painfully shy little man, who deserved better. I've never seen his sitcom on television, so I can only presume that it was never made and the whole experience was for nought.
We had to sign contracts giving the BBC full ownership of our work and were not paid much. If we'd known what was going to happen, we'd have been better off selling it to BBC Scotland or Channel 4, as it was more their kind of thing.
There was far too much booze on the go and the BBC people all got merrily sloshed. Ben Elton turned up, bless him, he didn't have to. All the BBC cared about was that the buffet wasn't up to standard for him. He was very gracious, stayed longer than he'd intended, answering questions and generally giving advice, but he desperately wanted to get home as his wife had recently given birth after many years of trying to conceive.
After all the stuff that has come out about the BBC ignoring the goings on by the likes of Savile and Mr Gadd, our experience of The Corporation was no better! The wrong people are overpaid and anybody over the age of 30 is ignored. I hardly ever watch BBC1. Their 'sitcoms' of the last 15 years have, in general, been atrocious. When we were there, they kept banging on about 'My Family', which had not been broadcast yet. My sister and I watched it in utter despair and wondered what the hell such fine Shakespearean actors as Robert Lindsay and Zoe Wannamaker were doing. I hope they got paid a lot.
The BBC are the mafia of all the production companies going. If your face doesn't fit, 'You'll never work again in this town' seems to be their mantra. They are not worth the licence fee and it goes through me to pay it!