Why Do I Feel Unwanted By My Family

[postage]

I have grown up kids in their 40's when they are happy they don't need me and my son only needs me for money and girl only when she needs help around house. am I being unreasonable top say I feel lonely

[woofgang]

What else do you do besides help the kids? I don't think reasonable or unreasonable comes into whether or not you feel lonely but it may be unreasonable (and not sensible) to "buy" your children's company with money and assistance.

[cassa333]

Not unreasonable at all.

Think how you were with your parents. Did you spend a lot of time with them? We're they effectively friends in your adult life?

If yes then you are not unusual but you are lucky. More so Nowadays children grow away from us and to a degree that is what we want for them. To be independant but know they can come to us when they need to.

How often do you phone them just for a chat? I remember my sister complaining that her daughter never phoned but when questioned further she never rang her either.

However you could look to join local clubs or something. depending on your age there are plenty of things you can do. Perhaps even join or start a Men's Shed. Your life shouldn't revolve around the next visit from your children.

I hope you find something to occupy your time.

[woofgang]

hmmm....postage has got 40 yo kids and her sis has just had a baby....possible but odd?
http://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/Family/Family-Life/Question1063632.html

[Baldric]

Postage would be 61 now going by this from Jan2012

///where will I live
can one of you lovlies answer this question, I am 58 and have no pension. I have no saving and no family member that has a spare room should i LOOSE my job within this year - where will I live when I...
14:00 Thu 26th Jan 2012///

[grasscarp]

I think you are not unreasonable to say you feel lonely, but children do grow up to have lives of their own. I have just got back from babysitting the grandchildren for a few hours, but I dont expect to be involved with that daughter unless she needs me or happens to be in the area anyway.

[mazie]

Yep, I'm with Grasscarp.


(any progress on the OH grass?)

[grasscarp]

Still in hospital and discussions underway as to (looks like) care home next. Thanks for asking. Tonight grandson wanted to see Maisy mouse cartoon on my ipod. This took several minutes as I could only think of your spelling!

[sharplesson]

well may be they are busy in their life and forget to understand your need. You can do one thing, why not talk to them and let them know about your situation.

You can trust your children, because they are mature enough to understand you. Else later it will bother them, when they will reach to your age.