I don't feel ready

[Tock389]

Hello. Do you believe you have to be happy in yourself before looking for a relationship? The thing is, I'm single but I have so much going on in my life at the moment - i.e. trying to find a new job and leave my shared house and move somewhere smaller - that I don't feel ready, or available, to the opposite sex.

Is this normal? What do you think, girls? Would you rather be with me if I'm more settled?

[B00]

If you're not ready, you're not ready!

There's no hard and fast rules, if you're happy staying single for a while- do it!

[Rubyrose]

I think you are right. You can't concentrate on someone else unless you have sorted yourself out first. I think you will know when you are ready. It will happen when it happens and you will be in a better place to focus on it and deal with it when it does happen coz you will have spent time concentrating on yourself first. Nothing wrong with being single. Enjoy it. xx

[Homer55]

Im recently single and it was my first serious relationship, im not particualy ready yet for a relationship but am worried if i leave it too long that ill be single for as long as last time, which i dont want. I suppose you need to be ready in yourself first.

[Rubyrose]

Homer.. I'm the same. I'm recently single after my first real relationship and everyone keeps telling me I need a boyfriend! I don't want one. I am taking some time out. I haven't been single since I was 16 and now I am 21.i am going to enjoy my time off. It will happen when it happens but most importantly, it will happen when I am ready for it. You have to be comfortable with yourself first.

[peterd]

I don't think your situation should makes you less attractive to be with. Would you be put off someone in your position ? It prolly helps a little being happy in your self but sometimes a kick up the backside will get you in gear & away you go

[electricblue]

Its gotta be good to be with someone who's settled and happy in themselves,and when someone special comes along you will both be ready for whatever it brings,,,just my opinion though!!!

[robbo82]

I definitely think you need to need to be settled, otherwise you will probably spend too much time sorting things out and neglect your partner, or vice versa. My last two relationships have ended because I have not been able to devote enough time to them due to various other things going on in my life. I think you need to make sure can put the time and commitment in before embarking on a serious relationship.

[Miss Zippy]

I think you have to be happy with yourself and your life before you can really enjoy and appreciate a relationship. Too many people seem to think that a relationship is the be all and end all and think that a relationship will solve all their problems and worries. It should be icing on the cake and something that enriches an already full and happy life. Although you are not ready for a relationship, you will be all the more attractive to people when you are because you have so much going on in your life and aren�t waiting around for it to happen.

[Amara]

Sometimes life takes you by surprise though, my husband was 27 and single when we met - he was training to be a pilot at the time and had no intention of getting into a relationship with anyone. But we met and that was it - 12 years later we are just as in love as the first day. So never say never - Amara xx

[Bohne]

Don't let anybody tell you that you are not an absolute complete person while being single.

Whenever you are ready, it will happen, and prince charming will cross your way.
You won't be able to resist and therefore know that you are ready.

At least that's what happened to me.

After moving back to Germany, I had so much to do, getting my life in order, and I was single for about five years, without missing anything.
Then my husband turned up, and things just fell into place.