Ex Pester

[jibjab]

You probably all know my situation right now, my ex dumped me ......anyway....

I vowed on Sunday not to contact her again and delete her number.

Then she rang me last night and woke me up, asking me if i miss her, telling me she missed me and also askin if id been with any women

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN??

has a new relationship of hers gone pear shaped or something??

why come crying back to me after a month of being apart??

So far it has been me pushing to get back together, but as soon as I lay off and accept its over, she starts texting and phoning me!!!

BLOODY WOMEN !!

[Homer55]

Same thing has happened to me, its a load of rubbish, there not happy been with you but dont want you to see anyone else. My ex spilt up with me, then a week later, yeah a week annouced to me that she was seeing someone else.then she text me saying she wasnt sure she made the right desicion, I went to meet her and all I got out of her was "I dont know what to say to you", You need to get her to delete your number and find someone better..

[Richie1976]

The grass is always greener spring to mind. Tell her where to go, mate.

[Amara]

My advice as a bloody woman would be to play it very cool with her and tell her that you will not be messed around and until she makes a grown up decision not to contact you again. If she is not with you she has no right to ask you what you are doing and you should point that out. She sounds very mixed up and until she sorts herself out I would ignore her completely. If and when she wants to come back then you can make your choice, but I suspect by then you will have moved on. Her loss I think. Love and light - Amara xx

[kazzianne]

I agree totally with the other posts.Myabe she has heard that you have been going out and having a good time etc and she preferred it when you were chasing her! She's got the hump that you are moving on.She dumped you for gods sake,so I would tell her that.

Ask her what she wants and say you are not prepared to play games any more.Good luck!.xx

[malaise]

She's not coming crying back to you. She's trying to boost her own ego, by assuring that you're not "over" her.

I'd tell her "Well, yeah, I am interested in someone at the moment, it's early days... So I'd rather you didn't phone me again." Be blunt, and she'll take the hint. She's just using you to make herself feel better, and don't forget that x

[ELVIS68]

Women eh??...cant`t live with us...definately can`t live without us

[Homer55]

You mean you cant live with them, cant kill em!!

Only joking ladies I love you all!

[caz21]

Tell her you're off out at the weekend for a one night stand!

Don't want to sound harsh jibjab but i think she is using you as her fall back plan! its always nice to think someone loves you and needs you!

keep well clear of her, go out and have fun coz you deserve it! from what i gather she is not a very nice person and you are better off without her! xx

[electricblue]

She's playing you jibjab,she has to be the centre of your world,she keeps you hanging on,false hope,anything to continue her sick,pathetic little games,she's in desperate need of attention,from you or anyone who will give it to her,you are worth more than that 'silly little girl' who is gonna get herself in some real strife one day through her own stupid fault,,find yourself someone who will treat you properly,,,,there,,,thats off my chest!!

[Miss Zippy]

It's the classic she doesn't want you but doesn't want anybody else to have you. As already stated, she just wants to hear that you're missing her to massage her ego. I read your other posts about what she was like when you were together and can't fathom out why you were with her! You said in other posts you're too nice. Well this is your chance to be the b*stard and stand up for yourself. People like her (men and women) will never change so just accept that and cut her out of your life for good.

[Rubyrose]

Let me tell you now... she doesn't want you, but she doesn't want anyone else to have you! You need to be strong and tell her to leave you alone. The more you push her away the more she will try and come back. If you want her back then it sounds like you can get her back but you have to be strong and not drop to your knees and beg her to take you back. Needy is NOT attractive. The second she sees you have moved on, she wants you so you need to give the constant illusion that you are getting on with your life.

For every action there is a reaction and right now you are in the 'Push me pull you' mode. You won't realise it but all these little things you are doing are called pushes... if you tell her you still love her.. then thats a push and in return for your push she will pull away. She will tell you she doesn't want you back and so on. You need to change this. You need to be the one creating a pull so she comes towards you and the only way you can do this is to seem like you don't need her. She calls you in the middle of the night for reassurance that you are still there and waiting for her as a back up, should she ever need you. Now you and her may never get back together but you need to get used to it and learn to be on your own and get out of this rut before it sticks. Don't let this continue coz she will tug at your heart strings for as long as she can. She might stay with that other guy for another year but continue to call you in the middle of the night and ask if you love her.

I'm not telling you to be rude to her. Just simply be civil and impersonal. Next time she calls in the middle of the night, either don't answer your phone or answer and tell you she should call you at a more convinient time and hang up. If she calls back then don't answer. You need to shift this so she feels like the irrational one.. not you.

[ELVIS68]

There`s a book out there somewhere called... How to get rid of your ex...or something similar to that, it`s quite good...apparently!!!!

[Rubyrose]

Shurrup Elvis, ya big lurker. I knew you was behind me! ;o)

[silverdaler]

she probably rang late at night to spoil any fun you might have been having - or perhaps she had just a disappointing night herself. very selfish i know, but we are not all the same hun !

good luck x

[spaced]

been there mate, I feel for you. Tell her to find her hook and sling it.

[dyli795]

its human nature. ive done it myself and had it done to me. she's probably had an unsuccessful night out, felt insecure and ,looking for an ego boost, rang good old you. she had to just nudge you to make sure your'e still pining for her. keep up your strong resolve not to contact her and if she really cares she'll persevere. by then you might not want her anyway. i know how hard it is beleive me. good luck