Neighbours Cat And New Kitten

[LinziMissy]

Hi, I have never used a forum before so would really appreciate it if somebody could offer me some advice. We have just adopted a 7 week old kitten and she has settled in very well considering it has only been 3 days. Having a slight problem with the neighbours cat though. He's always been a very lovely cat and he is very well looked after by his family. However, he has taken a liking to coming into our house for cuddles (no food) which we have allowed but never for very long before we put him out again. Saturday morning he was outside when I went to the garage so I let him into our hallway to look at Missy through the glass door into the living room. At first he just meowed and sniffed her under the door but then he got frustrated and threw himself at the glass in an aggressive manor and made some horrible noises. I had never seen him like this so I put him straight outside again. He has now decided to hang out by our garden patio door which looks into our living room, where Missy likes to play behind the curtains, and he's making constant meowing sounds. I called him away from the door this morning, when I left for work, and gave him some treats and a fuss outside but I don't know what else to do or whether or not I should let him meet her? He hasn't been neutered and I wonder is this is why he is behaving the way he is. Any advice would be greatly received.

[Canary42]

Stop the treats and replace with a boot up the bum until he stays away.

[boxtops]

I'm afraid you have to give him the message that he's no longer welcome, and keep him well away from your kitten until she's old enough to be speyed.

Seven weeks is actually very young for a kitten to be taken away from its mother - is she managing OK, to eat and look after herself?

Cats are very territorial (especially males) so you may need to tell your neighbours that you are keeping the tom away from your female. You could throw in a comment about your worry that he's not been neutered - I don't understand why people don't do this unless the cat's a pedigree and they want to breed from it.

She's too little to go outside yet, make sure you get all her jabs up to date as soon as you can, and take advice from the vet.

The tom's aggression is totally expected - there's another cat on what he's come to think of as "his patch".

Stop fussing him - don't let him get face to face with her yet. Older cats don't always like new kittens, especially if they're not related to them.

[LinziMissy]

Eeek! I couldn't be nasty to him. It's only us and our neighbours who live where we are so he's kind of had two families for over a year. Sometimes we don't see him for a few days and he has a catflap at his house (which he goes out of but not sure if he uses it to get in) and a cat hut outside so he's not neglected. I'm just wondering whether I should let him in to have a proper sniff or keep them apart? Maybe this would stop him hunting her down from the outside because this is what he seems to be doing at the moment with all his strange meowing and sitting by the windows waiting.

[Eve]

If he hasn't been neutered and has been behaving like this I wouldn't let him near a new female kitten.

It may be some tough love to keep him away but if you encourage him then you may be making a rod for your own back, it may take some time as you have let him come in for affection and treats previously.

[boxtops]

No, don't let him in. Toms spray, and if you don't want him doing that in your house to assert his "ownership". We've had cats for years and there is still serious rivalry between ours and the cats next door. He's trying to tell her who's boss, at the moment.

[jomifl]

Keep them well apart unless you want a dead Missy. Cats have a different set of rules to humans and killing non related young cats is not uncommon.

[KristalB]

Linzi your neighbours cat thinks your place is also his place,his territory, and your kitten is now a threat to his territory and a threat to all the treats you've been giving him. I would speak to your neighbour and explain the situation and perhaps, with your neighbour, introduce the cat to your kitten in a controlled environment -after all I presume your cat will be going outside when she gets older. But be careful -the tomcat may attack your kitten. i would tend to agree with Canary and replace the treats with a shoo away. the tomcat has to get the message that the kitten is part of your family and there to stay. Oh and make sure you get your kitten spayed -yur vet will be able to tell you the best time for that.

[LinziMissy]

Thanks for your answer. I was concerned that she was too young but the lady seemed to want them gone so I felt I had to 'rescue' her from what was a bit of a mad house :/ She's doing very well...eating, using her litter tray and had her first poop this morning. She loves to play with us and sleep beside me. We get on well with our neighbours so I will have a chat with them if it continues. Just such a shame, I thought he'd be lovely with her as he is a bit of a wimp and so nice natured usually. She won't be going out for at least a year and will be getting spayed as soon as she turns 5 months. Vaccines booked in too....do you think they could meet when she's older?

[jakep]

I agree with what has been said. Missy is now an intruder on his patch and he will not like it. If you owned him then with time and patience you could sort this out but unfortunately he must now be excluded from your lives. You don't need to be mean - just completely ignore him, don't even look at him.

[LinziMissy]

Thank you all very much for your answers, it's been a massive help. I'm going to stop being so soft towards him and hope he get's the message. It's not like he's a stray or unloved. Just hope his meowing doesn't scare Missy when I'm not there!

[boxtops]

Linzi, you might not be letting her out yet but there is always the risk she'll escape (and I speak from experience) - take the kitten to the vet for her jabs a.s.a.p., and advice re flea prevention, and get her microchipped at the same time, just in case she gets out (and she'll want to - a year's a long time to keep a kitten indoors, she'll want to be out in the springtime!). Microchipping was the only way Rover was returned to me a couple of years ago.

You may well be able to introduce the cats in due course, when she's bigger - but I suggest the garden (with her in a cage) would be better than in the house Tom considers is his territory.

[LinziMissy]

That's a good idea boxtops, hadn't thought of trying that in the garden. Definitely will be getting her micro chipped. Don't want her to go out at all really but I guess it would be unfair if I didn't let her.

[boxtops]

It depends, linzi. We had house cats for several years when we lived near a busy road - but cats are naturally outdoor beasties, and most love it when they do go out. She's young enough for you to train her to a harness and lead (not just a lead) so you could take her out in the garden.

Please don't be tempted to get any sort of collar for her - I nearly lost Rover twice when he nearly hanged himself on branches and window catches with his collar, and No 1 Son always used to end up with his stretchy collar as a bandolier, he always managed to get one leg through as well as his head. Microchipping removes the need for ID collars!

[Prudie]

She certainly needs to stay in until she's had her injections (so complete at 12 weeks). After losing loved pets on the road I tried to keep cats as housecats but unfortunately they have a habit of getting out eventually and when they're older they'll be oblivious to the dangers. She'll have to meet him one day and after some hisses they'll probably get on OK but not yet, she's far too small to defend herself and of course will need spaying.

[nungate]

Best to keep the Tom away from your girl. We have just adopted a kitten ourselves and we are having a bit of bother with our oldest cat, but then she has always been a bit grumpy with the younger members of our tribe (we now have five) it's simply a case of never leaving the kitten alone with the older cats and since your neighbour's cat doesn't live with you it would be best all round to keep him out and maybe consider keeping your girl as an indoor cat. We live near a very bust road so all of ours stay inside. They have plenty to amuse them, even their own room and are all content (even the grumpy one) On different matter, our kitten came to us chipped and neutered despite being only 10 weeks old - we were told this was common practice these days if you want to see your vet about it, you could even ask whether they do a kitten check, our vet does this with no charge. Good luck with your new kitty, there are quite a few cat slaves around AB so you'll always find someone around for advice

[LinziMissy]

Thank you all again....Just checked her on my lunch break and she was having a nap, then wanted to play...lot's! No Pickles (neighbours cat) in sight so that was good. I feel the whole indoor / outdoor cat issue will be my next question when the time comes. I'm considering cat proofing the garden? Even though we have very quiet woodland to the front, there is only farmland / a goose field separating us from a by-pass to the back :( Pickles got attacked by the Gander so he tends not to go that way! Glad to hear there are lot's of animal lovers on here that are able to help. Hopefully I'll be able to return the favour sometime :)

[boxtops]

It's too hard to catproof a garden - cat wants in or out, she'll get there! I wouldn't worry too much myself about the bypass - that cat programme on the TV showed that domestic cats don't roam hugely far. I can warn you though, fields and woodland will mean she brings you lots of presents, some of them more alive than others :-)

Kittens are like that - sleep suddenly, wake suddenly, dash about, sleep again. They do need a lot of sleep at that age!

[LinziMissy]

Oh I missed that! Was that the one where they were wearing a camera? That's reassured me a bit. I'm just hoping she's not too adventurous when she's older and prefers to be pampered and close to home!

[boxtops]

Yes, they were wearing a GPS signaller too, so they could log where they'd been. Have a look here! http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-22821639