Aphantasia

[cassa333]

Just taken twenty minutes trying to explain to my OH what the effect of this is but he couldn't understand that I could not describe what our children look like.

He could not grasp the fact I cannot visualise and describe in my head what anything looks like.

Added to that Tinnitus and Visual Tinnitus and I should be a basket case. Luckily I've always had it so it doesn't effect me, so much so that he didn't even know I had it lol Just a bit of an oddity.

[Elina]

Hi Cassa, I've never heard of 'Aphantasia' I had to Google that. A link for others on here x .. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-34039054

[Elina]

Nor visual tinnitus?

[grasscarp]

Sorry to hear about your problems Cassa. It sounds like you are coping, so well done.

[Elina]

You obviously don't let it impact on your life as grasscarp has said.

[Elina]

How long have you been with your partner Cassa?

[Cloverjo]

I've never heard of visual tinnitus, but I have failed to recognise family members at times.
Once I was in my car to go out and I saw a young couple walk up the drive. I waved to them, thinking they were delivering magazines or something. When I got to the end of my drive I realised they were my own son and his fiancée.
I couldn't believe I didn't recognise my own son, but yes that happened.

[Elina]

Hey clover,
Did you read my reply to you on the good morning thread? x

[Elina]

& clover, that's very strange regards you not recognising family members.

[wolf63]

I used to dread my dad dying and me having to identify his body. Many old men look the same to me.

As it was he died at home and I just assumed that it was him when I found him.

[Cloverjo]

Sorry, Elina. I didn't see your reply on the other thread at the time. You are definitely right. I would rather have stayed in and was even thinking about eating some dodgy mushrooms from my garden so I'd be too ill to go out. [really?Yes]
Instead I decided to "feel the fear and do it anyway" from that old self help book. It was ok. I managed to talk to people and had quite a nice time. Don't want to do it again soon, though. :)

[Elina]

It's truly awful. Could tell you of moments I've had but I won't clog cassas thread up with something unrelated. Didn't know there was a 'condition' that explained what 'I' was going through x

[Cloverjo]

Start a new thread, Elina. I'm sure there will be plenty of joiners.

[Elina]

Oh I don't know clover, might be just us two lol!

[cassa333]

Visual Tinnitus was a name a friend gave it so I'm not sure it is the right name or even a real thing.... just something in me.

This Visual Tinnitus is light. Lots of light when it is dark. Because I can't visualise actual images I think my Brian somehow makes them up of light particles.

If you imagine (as I can't lol) a fuzzy ill-defined abstract and formless shape possibley like seeing something through fog. Or the Crab Nebula through fog would be a better description. But every fuzzy detail is a dot of light. Shadow is dimmer light and more defined areas are brighter light but because the picture is made of fog every single space is a dot of light. Even the brighter areas are not defined so the picture is always an abstract.

Although I think the Tinnitus and the Visual Tinnitus are the things making it almost impossible to just drop off to sleep (three or four hours a night watching light and hearing a multitude of loud noises) I do cope with sleeplessness because when it is part of you you adjust and cope. It is only occasionally that I get a bit frustrated by it.

The Aphantasia was something I didn't know about because TBH you don't really realise you are different to everyone else because again, it is part of you and you just get on with it.

It does make hypnosis interesting though lol. I paid a lot of money for hypnotherapy at one time but it was a waste of time and money because the usual thing is that you have to imagin walking along a beach and stuff. I used to fall asleep out of boredom rather than being hypnotised. They still took my money though lol

[Smowball]

Im absolutely fascinated by this. I saw a programme once on a woman who couldn't remember faces whatsoever. She could see you a hundred times and every time she wouldn't recognise you but I don't think it's the same thing

[pastafreak]

cassa, google "visual snow"...lots of info, and there are forums for sharing experiences.

[cassa333]

Recognition of faces isn't a problem for me. I can recognise people I haven't seen for years. I rarely remember where or why I know them but remember the face. I would just not be able to describe them lol

Visual snow is exactly it. It seems there is not a lot that can be done about it. I suppose it would be more difficult to cope with if it was a sudden edition rather than something I have always had. As I sa getting to sleep is a real pain but Hahn that's life.

[cassa333]

Having really interesting conversations with family about this.

My dad seems to have it as well and although my daughter has it to a degree (she has difficulty pulling up mental pictures but she can only if she really tries) she cannot picture in her head faces. They are just a blank on a head shape.