How do you decide?

[Jan1957]

Questions I hadn't even thought of until I was asked today. What do you want to do with the ashes afterwards? Hadn't even thought about it.

[Jan1957]

Do I want to see him again before the funeral? Will you bring clothes down for him. My head is spinning tonight.

[Mamyalynne]

I was never in that position Jan, Bill was buried. Have you a favourite place you used to love or maybe Gary supported a particular sports team , some do allow scattering.

[Jan1957]

Sorry mrs c, meant to say Gary was 55.

[mrs.chappie]

Jan, did Gary have a favourite place? My OH loves the nature reserve where we go to watch wildlife and I'd like to scatter him there if he goes before me.

I expect if I go first, he'll scatter me there.

[Jan1957]

Not really mamya. It was just being hit with so many questions at once that totally confused me.

[anneasquith]

maybe decide tomorrow. im sure whatever you do decide it will be the right choice for gary and you.

[Mamyalynne]

I did see Bill and took his favourite casual clothes, even his broken glasses, the undertaker wanted to have them fixed.I said no, at the end of it all have a think and do what you feel is right for you.

[mrs.chappie]

So sad Jan, so young.

[Mamyalynne]

I do understand it is all too much at times but take time to sit and think and ask relatives etc

[looobylooo]

jan... my heart goes out to you ..... xx

[ttfn]

Hello Jan. I have been with 4 of my loved ones when they passed away. I have also seen my B.i.l. at the hospital chapel of rest and a very close friend at the undertaker's. My personal opinion here is no, I wouldn't want to see another before the funeral. I think memories of happier times are what carry us through ♥

[Jan1957]

I'd been doing so well till today but now can't think of anything. Looked at flowers and his mum wants me to sort them out for her too. Did too much walking today and the plaster has rubbed my foot so that is bleeding! All a bit much at the moment.

[Mamyalynne]

Keep flowers as simple as possible and rest that foot, you have a good few days to make all these decisions, get a note pad and jot things down as you go.

[Jan1957]

You're right mamya. Been a hard day. Will try to get some sleep now. Sorry to be a pain. Night all. xx

[ttfn]

Good night Jan ♥

[mrs.chappie]

Take care Jan. x

[Mamyalynne]

Never are you a pain ♥

[tamborine]

Its an awful process for you to go thru alone. My mail was full of suggested cemetaries, gardens of remembrance, engraved stones etc. I couldn't decide and scattered some ashes in the garden and kept the rest as am unable to dispose of them.

I hope you get some help with sorting things out.

[looobylooo]

good night jan,
try and rest your mind if you can, and get a good sleep :o)

[masma]

Jan... I'm probably a bit late now but do take your time, there's no rush to decide just what you want to do. Lots of love to you xxxx