Had Enough

[Rach2008]

Going to finish this misery. Had enough. Wish I had anyone who cared. Don’t tell me to call the Samaritans.

[Rach2008]

Mam - my doc gives me 2 Prozac on repeat, and 3 propranolol for my anxiety. It gets me through. But she only has 10 minutes.

Mam- honestly I think bout it every day. I really think what is the point? And there really is none.

[Mamyalynne]

You absolutely can do it, spend some time each day literally not thinking, switch off and just 'be', then as someone said make lists of any possible changes (small at first) that could help you tunnel out of where you are.

I'm sure I'm not alone in having faith in you.

[Atheist]

Rach. I do think that there is a point. You are here to seek support. Everyone here wants you to live and enjoy a prolonged life. Everyone here wishes you well. We are not your close friends, but we still wish you well. The world can seem like *** sometimes, but most people are good in their hearts. Don't give up because you feel bad right now. Better times are ahead.

[murraymints]

And apart from us who care..you have people at work that need you... you need to book a long GP appt and talk about your feelings....tabs are a help, but you need to make the reasons why you feel so bad clear in order for forward plans and measures to be taken

[murraymints]

Go to bed....try and sleep..put a radio on with soft background music...and come back to us in the morning... things should feel better knowing that we are listening..

[Baldric]

We are here, we are listening, reach out we are waiting to help.

[ChillDoubt]

Despite your state of mind it’s NEVER as bad as you perceive it to be, talk to someone, anyone, doesn’t have to be the Samaritans:

SupportLine Telephone Helpline: 01708 765200, email [email protected] or write to SupportLine at PO Box 2860, Romford, Essex RM7 1JA - Provides emotional support and details of support groups, helplines, agencies and counsellors throughout the UK

Calm: 0800 585858, www.thecalmzone.net - Campaign Against Living Miserably Help and support for young men aged 15-35 on issues which include depression and suicide.

HopeLine UK – 0800 068 4141 – for practical advice on suicide prevention www.papyrus-uk.org

Lifeline (N.Ireland)
0808 808 8000
www.lifelinehelpline.info
For anyone in N.Ireland who is in distress or despair. Immediate help on phone 24 hours a day 7 days a week. Face to face counselling can be arranged, also befriending, mentoring. Issues dealt with include suicide prevention, self harm, abuse, trauma, depression, anxiety.
Run by Contact N.Ireland www.contactni.com independent counselling service employing professional qualified counselors who have extensive experience of working with people facing a wide range of problems, free to all users.

Premier Lifeline
0300 111 0101
www.premier.org.uk/lifeline
Helpline providing a listening service, information, emotional and spiritual support from a Christian perspective

Samaritans:
Helpline: 116 123 (free of charge from a landline or mobile)
Email [email protected]
www.samaritans.org
24 hr helpline offering emotional support for people who are experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those which may lead to suicide

Useful websites

www.cwmt.org
In memory of Charlie Waller - awareness, information and resources for those who are depressed

http://www.healthtalk.org/
Others who have been bereaved by suicide share their experiences
www.olagola.org
Day to day support service and crisis support to help reduce suicide, depression and other stress related illnesses to service users who are in need of emotional support and encouragement. Instant online support for any person who may be experiencing something in their life which they may be finding difficult to cope with. Also peer to peer support facilitated and monitored through facebook by trained admins where service users support each other through discussion, topics and open forums https://www.facebook.com/olagola

www.metanoia.org/suicide

www.theblackdog.net - Supportive site for men who suffer from depression and/or suicidal thoughts

[maggiebee]

Despite what you have said, please think about giving Samaritans a ring. They are open 24/7 and will give you the time and space to talk about how you are feeling. It often helps to talk to a stranger who can give you as much time as you need. 116 123 and it's free. Please think about it.

[murraymints]

perhaps you have taken yourself to bed...come back and talk more....when you are ready to....Hope you can find peace xxx...

[jim360]

I hope that a thread like this is a plea for help rather than a final goodbye. That's how it reads to me. There is a part of you that is fighting on, even if it's angry. Hold on to that.

[alavahalf]

Strangers are the salt of the earth and lord knows, everybody needs somebody ... sometime.

Last year I spent more days than I should have on the beach just fishing and swimming. Thinking that I should be more constructive, I decided I was going to spend a day at the allotment. Even though I have spent 30 or more years searching for big waves, that particular day we had gales blowing and I thought, safety first. The sea was not a place for the average joe. Where I live I know the tides and currents well and at no time would I imagine I could ever be in danger.
So off to the allorment it was. On the way I had a feeling that I needed to go to the beach instead. I cant explain this feeling but I needed to go. I did a u turn and headed to the beach and then did another u turn and headed to the allotment. I dont know why but I turned back again and headed back to the beach.
When I got there it looked amazing and dangerous, the waves were collapsing onto the shingle well above head height, it was just about high tide. Not a single sole was present.
Without a thought I counted the waves in as I stood on the shingle. The wash went from ankle deep to chest deep. It was not a place for the inexperienced.
Personally I have spent years surfing in amongst big waves and felt confident swimming in this situation.
As I counted the waves in I knew more or less when the time was right to dive into the base of the wall of water that went well over my head. Up I popped through the back of the wave and them swam towards the next wall off water. After three waves I was 40 yards off the beach and fairly safe just treading water in the large swell.
Turning round to look back at the beach I seen an elderly gent struggling to walk down the shingle on the beach. He had a towel tucked under his arm. My immediate thought was he had come to go swimming. He obviously couldn't walk very well and in my mind certainly shouldn't attempt to enter the raging sea. None the less he dropped his towel and walked lower down the beach towards the sea. He then disappeared from my view as the waves were so big. After a few waves had gone through he didn't pop out as I had hoped he would. With that I then swam back towards the beach before getting picked up and thrown through the air on the last wave collapsing onto the beach. As I was in mid air I caught sight of the elderly man rolling down the shingle and being drawn out in the undertow. He had been knocked over and had no means of getting back on his feet. In these conditions the undertow would draw most people out and then the next wave would dump them on the shingle before drawing them out again to their death.
Once again I counted the waves in ( between 9-11 they get slightly smaller) before I dived into the first wave near to where this stranger had dissapeared. My timing was bad and I got launched back through the air towards the shingle. As expected I got drawn out with the undertow and lo and behold the stranger was right there beside me. Just then a smaller wave arrived and I managed to regain my feet and wrench the stranger onto his. The next big wave arrived and washed the pair of us right up onto the shingle. I kept hold of him and stopped him being drawn out with the undertow.
He coughed and spluttered and choked and cried .. so did I.
He laughed when I told him I had never been so scared in my life. He said that his whole life had passed in front of him, as he knew he was a gonner and he was only 78. He shook my hand and couldn't thank me enough. I pointed out that I really shouldn't be here as I should be sowing carrots and I dont know why I felt the urge to go there in the first place. He said my carrots will be amazing this year.
We parted with a hug .. never having been introduced in the first place. It just goes to show that reaching out can often help .. even save a life ,

Strangers are just friends you haven't yet met !
Come on Rach take the advice already given and just talk to someone.

[murraymints]

Hope you feel brighter this morning Rach xx

[murraymints]

please come back and talk some more Rach xx

[puzzled54]

Rach please check in. Don’t have any advice for you but you can change your life. Chilldout has given so many people you can call

[Old_Geezer]

C'mon Rach; not fair to worry folks regarding your intent, then not update. When you feel up to it please tell how you're going.

[jim360]

Profile marked as "User Inactive". If there is any way for the editing team to follow this up then I hope they do so.

[Mamyalynne]

It's sad that Rach has felt the need to leave AB, but if she is still reading this please know that we care and we tried.

I hope you find help to battle on through, because you really are strong enough.x

[tinkerbell23]

Hi Rach ... if you look in come say hello x