Don't feel bad about missing the appointment.
There are many types of logic in the world - 'cat logic' and 'addiction logic' are only two. It seems sensible in your head to have a couple of drinks or whatever. It would be like trying to have a sensible conversation with me when I am manic.
Try and make another appointment. The person wants to help you and you have nothing to fear from them. (coming from the person who is avoiding her psychiatrist!!)
Whatever you do keep in touch, we care.