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Women asking out Men

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girlieflirt | 13:48 Wed 19th Apr 2006 | Body & Soul
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What are peoples views on women asking out men? Do men prefer to do the asking out or do they like women to take control? I really like someone at the moment and not sure whether to be patient or be brave and ask him out for a drink! I think the main reason i dont want to ask him is the fear of rejection as i am not 100% sure he is definitely keen...x

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As a bloke I like it when women express and interest, mainly because I'm completely clueless about when to take an interest myself. So yes go and make a move he'll appreciate it.
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Thanks! he might not like me though? I have noticed some comments he has made, and we do flirt but how do i know he isn't just being friendly?

The worst that can happen is he says no. Most blokes will do it very gently though. It's difficult we all fear rejection.

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I know your right, thats what everyone has been telling me. But if he liked me that much, surely he would ask me? He can't like me that much then! I hate all this asking out stuff, im rubbish at it too!
girlieflirt I say go for it. I think it's a huge turn on.

He might be thinking the same thing as you....


"does she like me?"....."if I ask her out- is she going to say no?"


No harm in going for it, you might never know if you don't!

Thing is girlie he's in the same postion as you, he may well like you but maybe he thinks you are just being friendly so is also worried about rejection. You could just text him initially say something like "fancy a drink sometime" and then if he get's back you can go from there if not then you know and there's no embarassment.
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Your all right! There's nothing stopping me. I have to deal with him through work though so he might be cautious as we know each other on a professional level, even though we flirt outrageously! He once eve told me my jumper matched my eye make up, he told me he thought i was lovely and last week i sent him an easter egg and he told me i was still his favourite! But why don't i have the guts to email him and ask him! x

Do it ! and get back and tell us what happens, come on it's not just you now! We need to know!

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Thanks Loosehead..I havent met anyone i have liked in ages. He's lovely and makes me laugh a lot..he has a very attractive personality...I just don't want to ruin my chances so thats why im thinking may be be patient...x

I think it's fine for a woman to initiate it. You basically have 3 choices:-

1. Ask him out.
2. Flirt and give out all the right signals and then wait for him to do the asking, or;
3. Sit back and hope for the best!

If you do choose to make the first move then this will give off a clear indication that you are a strong and focused woman. If he likes that trait then you're quids in!

Best of luck. x

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Thanks Champagne! I will ask him out, may be email him...God all these dilemmas men put us through! x
Totally agree with Loosehead, us guys can be totaly clueless sometimes (hence the popularity of AB). If he says no, then he doesn't deserve you anyway - go for it Girl !!
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Ah thanks guys! Will keep you posted...Will he think im a prat? x
As a bloke, and I'm sure I speak for many others, I would love it if a girl asked me out! Especially if it was just something along the lines of "would you fancy going out for a drink sometime?" Keep it nice and simple. Go for it and good luck!

You know you want to ask him out so just do it now and stop worring about what he might say! if he doesnt like you at least you'll know and you can get on with things, trust me thats the worst that can happen. dont read to far deeply into every word this man says to you im sure he didnt think this deep about saying it, now go get him tiger!

I would love a girl to ask me out, I've always had to do the asking out and hate it. You should definitely go for it, even if a girl asked me out and I didn't want to go out with her, I'd be flattered and impressed she'd done it. Maybe if you just ask him out for a drink as a friend first, and you could take it from there, depending on how it goes?

JUST DO IT - you sound like you're a worrier to me - I bet this is all you're thinking/talking about.


There are people out there with real problems and this may even turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to you, far from a 'problem'


If you don't ask you'll never know and not knowing is surely worse than being turned down. The way I look at it its a fifty fifty situation, either yes or no, although from what you've said it sounds like the odds are more in your favour. Whats the worse that could happen??? Work is only work and you could ask him in a semi professional way then if he says no, you could play it down. Besides you only regret the thing that you don't do in life!!!!!

Well maybe you just have to wait until the conversation gets to a really pleasant point and say lightheartedly, "You know, you're really nice. I'd be tempted to invite you out for a drink if I wasn't so darned frightened of being rejected".


And then quickly move the topic on to something else to avoid embrarrassment. If he doesn't take a hint as broad as that he probably wants to avoid dating while you're working in the same company. And you've given him the opening he needs if he's as frightened of rejection as you are.

Just go for it. I have always been the kind of girl to ask guys out.. (Ok.. that makes me sound bad!!)


But what I mean is... I always ask myself first 'What have I got to lose'? Nothing. If you don't ask.. you don't get. Get on with it and stop sitting around worrying about it. :o)


xx

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