It's so unfair that at age 27 I still feel sick with worry about girls I like.

[Supernick]

I feel like I'm about 17 again, and this shouldn't be happening to me, but I think I'm getting quite obsessed (in a NON CREEPY way) with a girl at work. I really like her, and I'm convinced she's perfect for me. I've been spending a fair bit of time together, and we go out to lunch most days, just the two of us. I can't tell if she's interested though, and it's driving me nuts. How on earth am I
A. Going to find out she's interested
B. Actually ask her out. This is someone I work with so it's going to have to be during the day.

[Sasha13]

I think it's worth emailing her back and saying, ok, another night maybe?

At least that way you'll know one way or the other.

[China Doll]

How are you this morning?

It was kind of late notice hun so it may be worth another bash. Have you spoken to her today? Does she seem alright with you?

If so, it might be worth doing as Sasha suggested.

Yes cheries, I was sent on a blind date last night. It went fine.

[cheries]

What was he like CD?
Sorry, tell me to mind my own business if you like!!!
I have no love life at the moment so am presently living mine through everyone else x

[Hellyon]

Nick - - here's the thing, she likes being with you at lunchtime ASK HER OUT TO LUNCH ON A SATURDAY!!!!
Non threatening, no expectations and then you can feed the ducks or go to the movies.

[Hellyon]

Oh and even though she has said no several times she still keeps meeting you for lunch - if she was saying no because she doesn't want to go out with you she would start avoiding you at lunchtimes.....right girls?

[cheries]

Spot on Helly

[helliebobs]

nick I think you'll get there in the end don't be so hard on yourself! I'm exactly the same as Goodsy and have never been able to tell people I like how I feel about them - well I have but it takes me forever and lots of fannying about and general dithering and reading too much into stuff. I've just done it for the third time in my life and it was the scariest thing because this time I was really worried about mucking up my friendship with him. Needless to say it all went horribly wrong but I'm still glad I did it because now I know exactly where I stand (I think) and I know I can move on now and I'm still friends with him.
You will feel a huge sense of relief when you finally do it! And like you, I'm 27 and feel quite concerned that I still get wobbly about stuff like that and I'm separated with a young child :)

[Reverandfunk]

No love life Cheries???

[cheries]

You just can't help yourself, can you Rev?
1-0 to me x

[Supernick]

Urghh. I feel rough. Not only have I not talked to her yet, I've barely said so much as hello to anyone in the office.

It was late notice, so I'll see what happens today. Might wait for her to contact me though, otherwise I'm going to look like a stalker.

Time to get some orange juice..

[WoWo]

Came back to check your progress and find out you sent an email, bad move. As I said previously you need to make it 100% clear that this is a date, from what you say that doesn't seem to have been the case, however you have now moved it on to a different sceanrio.

The biggest mistake is that your email set a boundry, your success or failure was limited to a single response. You gave her the option to delay or avoid the issue because even if she wasn't going out she could say she was. If you wanted to do it via email (which in my opinion is never a good idea) should have been to say something along the lines of "do you fancy going for a drink after work some time, just me and you".

However all is not lost, I do agree that no additional reply from her of "can't tonight but maybe another time" might put a bit of a downer on the situation, however as I say she may not be fully aware of what you were asking.

Nothing left to do in my opinion other than ask outright for a date. Believe me the pain will be over quickly.

[China Doll]

Go with what WoWo said m'dear, it makes sense and he's a boy so I guess he knows what it's like from the other angle.

cheries, it was fine, ten fingers, one head and no siamese twin. It was a favour for a mate really.

[Hellyon]

WHAT'S HAPPENING!!! I've got my lunch and I'm here waiting for the next installment.........

By the way just to keep you going; I used to have a male friend, when we weren't going out with anyone we used to go to gigs, pub, movies etc. I realised that I had started to have feelings for him and, after putting it off for YEARS I screwed up my courage to tell him that I thought of him as more than a friend - guess what he felt the same about me, we have been together 20 years and married 15 with a wonderful son. Our only regret.........that we wasted so much time f@rt@rsing about at the begining as we would have been together 26 years!!!

[Supernick]

Calm down Hellyon. Nothing new on the horizon, because I thought I'd wait today and see if she got in contact. None so far, so I might just leave it for today, then catch her unawares on Friday because someone has just announced leaving drinks...

[China Doll]

Erm Nick....

Last time you caught her unawares she couldn't make it!

[Hellyon]

Well put China!

Carpe Diem

Faint heart never won a fair maid

shall I go on?

[Reverandfunk]

Burger me mate the way yr going you'll be eyeing her up in the q to get your buss pass!

Face to face, say shame about last night but the rugbys on the week end or so and so band, worst thing she will say is no and if she does are you in a worse position as the one yr already in???

[jon1968]

Yup, agree with Rev. Why don�t you grow a pair?!

[helliebobs]

Awww rev don't be so hard on him, it's not easy you know!
Hopefully she still feels the same way about him but if she doesn't, he still has to work with her!

[cheries]

Rev that's well harsh!!!
He's only a kid....don't you remember what you were like at that age?
Not as confident as you are now honey I'm certain x