How would you feel about this?

[sosad]

Having just answered How should i feel. I wondered how many of you would feel if the girl who went off with your boyfriend but knew nothing about you.
I don't want anything to do with her. my friend says i am being silly because she didn't know about me therefore she didn't hurt me intentionally. I associate her with the pain I felt and she is successfully getting him. What she's getting she doesn't really know. But still.

[Lakitu]

It's not her you should be feeling anger toward, it's him. Your friend is correct, she didn't know of your existence, she was as deceived as you were, whether she realises it or not.

[sosad]

May be not Lakitu, but if it happened to you, do you really think you would be able to seperate the feelings out and proportion blame correctly when your heart was broken so deeply.
And they have done and are doing everything you had been planning? I don't think you'd or anybody else would want anything to do with either of them in all true honesty would you?

[Lakitu]

It did.

I was angry with him, not her.

[naflharrison]

hi unfortunately i was once the other woman and i knew nothing about her and kids and that is the truth, when he told her yes she was angry with him but she blamed me more as it was easier to vent her anger on someone she didnt know who had hurt her rather than her husband.
to be honest it actually really hurt me more that she blamed me for everything than finding out that i was in fact the other woman.
as hard as it is try to understand that the other girl will also be hurting as effectively she was being cheated on aswell. i no its hard but you will get there.
as it happens they stayed together and worked things out and i am happily married myself.
there is light at the end of the tunnel but try and focus your anger to the person who has decieved 2 people ie your boyfriend.

[sara3]

I read somewhere that if someone steals your partner, the best revenge is to let them keep him/her.

[lajohn]

i agree with your friend. the girlfriend knew nothing about you, you should not be angry with her but angry with your boyfriend.

[Bohne]

I don't see where it matters one way or the other!
Who forces you to keep either's company.

Just get on with your life and forget about them!
BOTH