Social anxiety disorder

[karmgirl]

Has anyone got this?

Can you describe your symptons to me cus I'm sure I have this

[chewbacco]

whats your symptoms then research on google or see your gp

[karmgirl]

Fear of eating in public

Fear of speaking on phone and others hearing me and feeling really self conscious

Worried that I am too quiet and don't talk or can't hold a conversation

Facial tension

Keeping quiet in debates and not contributing other peoples conversations

[squarebear]

Fear of eating in public?!

Sounds like you need to see a psychiatrist.

[Octavius]

Thats just a situaitonal fear or panic attack. What happens when you get these symptoms?

[chiswicik]

karmgirl, are you Cuddleme?

[BigDogsWang]

You are not alone Karmgirl. Although not diagnosed, I am a sufferer. My symptoms include; avoiding social situations, discomfort when being with only one other person, analysing meetings or conversations with people (inc. friends) and worrying if you came across OK, hoping people don't strike up a conversation with you in a supermarket for example, just basically wanting to keep yourself to yourself, worrying if people are getting bored of listening to you.....

I could go on.

I try to overcome my shyness by doing the job that I do which entails dealing with clients and members of the public. I know that if I didn�t do this I would become a recluse.

If you still want confirmation try


http://www.social-anxiety.org.uk/whatis/whatis .htm

Here to help.....

[karmgirl]

I am just anxious

No I am not cuddlebear

[karmgirl]

Big Dogs wang - I have had a look at that website and the self diagnosis quiz I took on there said it is unlikely i have this disorder but I am not convinced. Then on another quiz to test for this I scored 93% which meant it was highly likely I had this.

And the symptons you mentioned I have those too:: -

1) Scared that when on phone at work people won't try and make conversation otherwise I have to speak more while the people in my office are listening to me and judgin me

It's really affected my work as I have to make phone calls but try not to do them or just call when the people are out the room

[karmgirl]

1) hope that people don't try to make conversation with me I mean

[BigDogsWang]

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you?

[karmgirl]

I am 20, how old r u?

[Emily Ball]

karmgirl you are what used to be called, in more sensible times, shy. At the age of twenty, you are just out of teenagerdom, a time when we are notoriously self-absorbed, worry about how attractive(or unattractive) we are, how cool we appear and dread 'making fools' of ourselves in front of others. We all go through this phase to a greater or lesser degree. Believe me, the coolest chicks have their moments of anxiety and self-doubt. If you believe it's a great deal more than this, and it's making you depressed, by all means go to your G.P., explain how you feel and ask him if he would refer you to someone who could help you overcome your anxieties. A word of advice if you choose this route- don't go telling your G.P. that you've been researching your symptoms on the net- they tend to get a bit shirty .

[karmgirl]

Emily Hall - I do feel its more than what normal anxiety should be but how do I tell? I am anxious enough to try and avoid making phone calls - is that too anxious

[BigDogsWang]

I am 40. I would say at 20 that it's too early to tell if you are suffering from SAD, or just shy. Please don't give up your job because of it, you may find over time that you gain more confidence. Strangely, I could talk on the phone all day to clients and members of the public, but become very withdrawn with friends and family. Paranoia plays a huge part in SAD. You think all the time that people are watching and listening to you. Try to convince yourself they are not.

Also, don't worry about not joining in debate or other peoples conversations. If you are not outspoken, that's fine. People will just have to accept that you are who you are. But if you don't want to be a wallflower, you need to stick with the type of job you are doing in order to gain confidence.

[karmgirl]

Thanks BigDogWang

I am grateful for everyones advice but I want to know what I can actually DO to be better at this and be more confident and assertive and not be so anxious as at the moment I am just drifting and accepting it. I am fed up of being like this I want an instant cure now.

[mandimoo]

pretty sure ive got it. ive been avoiding friends cos of it and im pretty sure they think ive disowned them cos i dont like them anymore. true i have moved a bit further away but im finding it harder and harder to spend any time with them as i never know what to say to them now i dont see them so much. its like im not part of their life anymore. so now its just feeding on itself.

[goldilocks1]

Have you been put down by other people in the past for things you have said or done? If you have this may be the reason you feel scared to communicate to others. The way we act and feel about ourselves is usually determined by our past experiences so if you have had negative responses from people in the the past to things you have said or done it may have resulted in you feeling this way.

I am no counciller but I think that it may help if you can get urself a little book (that is personal to you) and write down all the good points about urself. If you find this difficult why not ask a close friend or family member to help you. I am sure that you will be able to come up with at least 3 things whether it be that you are caring or even something as little as u have nice nails! You need to start thinking about ur positive qualities. Each day if you do something that you feel can be seen as positive, note it down in ur book. Set yourself a weekly or even daily challenges such as 'today I am going to answer at least one phone call in a confident voice'.

Next, write down a list of some people that you would like to be like. Think about why you would like to be like them, is it they have money, nice boyfriend, a loving family, confidence? Finally, think about what you can do to help you be more like the way you want and as long as it is achievable, make a list and do it!!!!

With regards to speaking on the phone, I used to be terrified as I got a job when I left college working in cold calling sales! OMG, I was only there a couple of months and by the time I left I was terrified of the phone for fear of rejection (past experiences again!). I eventually got over this because I had to. One thing that helped me deal with my 'phone phobia' was the thought that the person on the other end did not know me and if I did not know the answer to a question I just said "I'm not quite sure about that, if you just hold for one moment I

[goldilocks1]

Answer cont ......

I hope this helps but I just want you to think about how special you are (and you are cuz there is no one else like you in the whole WORLD!). If you have a bf or gf tell them that you need to be made a fuss of now and then. Good luck x

[goldilocks1]

The rest of that line read ...'if u would just hold the line for one moment I will find out for you' x

[BigDogsWang]

One thing I forgot to ask you Karmgirl, what is your job?