i feel really sorry for ur hubby...u want to re consider ur marriage to him,what were u doing on a dating website? 1st time on it ? i would guess u were on it quite a while before u discovered ur first love ,am sure u didnt just find him on this site 1st go....u have allready told ur husband and now he knows,he will be thinking the worst,his world will be turned upside down ,if u want to try work things out with ur hubby then show him what u have written to people here,instead of him thinking u have been having an affair for ages he will at least see what ur going through by writing to ab,ers..so at least he will ave a clear picture in his mind what ur thoughts are/what ur feeling,it will hurt him but at least its better than him lying awake all nite worrying that its more than just a silly childhood thing,...this sounds like a silly stupid fatuation to me,ok u were both young and them feelings of wot if are still there but as u have been told people change,he wont be the same, that for sure..let the past stay in the past and enjoy ur memory of the past.ur hubby dont deserve this,come clean,u have insulted and disrespected ur good husband by even bringing this other guy round ur doorstep,so not on either!! anyway enough said..