ChatterBank0 min ago
Am I confused or what?!
7 Answers
Long story - short, I'm male btw: go thru schooling thinking I'm gay or maybe bi. Love the attention I get from it being quite camp etc. Go off to uni again love the attention but get confused, at this point never had a boy/girlfriend, kiss my best friend (girl), struggle with my confusion, decide to enter a serious relationship with her (it felt right thing to do) become different person (i.e. less camp), get engaged, become totally devoted only a few times do I think about men, 3 years later after a troublesome last year she finishes with me but depsite some bad times there were some good times, she also hints that I need to explore my "other side", 5 months later meet up and sleep with a guy from internet, he turns out to be a player but during the few physical moments we have I don't feel comfortable and think about ex, spend next 2 months "coming out" to everyone again loving the attention from being Mr Camp again, chat to few guys online, last night meet up with a real nice lad, have a nice cosy night with DVD etc but again when came down to the physical side really struggled to feel comfortable and at moments thinking about women and sometimes spefically my ex (and her new fella). Despite the fact that I've been getting off at lot recently on gay porn.
So now I'm confused as I'm unsure am I not able to perform physcially with a male because I'm not gay or because I've spent the past 3 years (and the only time) of my life being physical with a women (i.e. habit or used to it). I'm not sure if the fact that I've been slightly addicted to internet porn since that age of 13 is a factor? To begin with my ex, I was like I am now with these guys but eventually the physical side became amazing. If I was to say I'm straight now many people would be shocked and wouldn't believe it as so many people say they always thought I was gay even when with my ex.
So now I'm confused as I'm unsure am I not able to perform physcially with a male because I'm not gay or because I've spent the past 3 years (and the only time) of my life being physical with a women (i.e. habit or used to it). I'm not sure if the fact that I've been slightly addicted to internet porn since that age of 13 is a factor? To begin with my ex, I was like I am now with these guys but eventually the physical side became amazing. If I was to say I'm straight now many people would be shocked and wouldn't believe it as so many people say they always thought I was gay even when with my ex.
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I'm so unsure as to what to think as I am a very sexual person but finding it a surprise to being unable to perform (and think about other things) when with men. I wondering if I'm just a camp guy who finds men attractive to look at ... if so which females in their right mind would want to be with me??!!
So confusing, any advice. Cheers!
So confusing, any advice. Cheers!
Thanks Pikzee ... no it doesn't sound harsh. I would except the attention seeking bit but I'm just a bit confused about my attraction to pics of or just guys generally on the street (when I'm not around my mates etc).
Something else I remember (and I don't know why I do this) but my ex kept pointing out during our time together "why does anytime the word gay or someone gay get's mentioned on TV/newspaper etc you make a big issue of it".
It was very weird also to find out recently that my ex boss, former lecturers and some other people said things to me like "I always thought you were gay we just didn't like to ask".
But thanks for your response ... but being a camp, attention seeking straight guy is not gonna get the girls banging down my door! LOL
Something else I remember (and I don't know why I do this) but my ex kept pointing out during our time together "why does anytime the word gay or someone gay get's mentioned on TV/newspaper etc you make a big issue of it".
It was very weird also to find out recently that my ex boss, former lecturers and some other people said things to me like "I always thought you were gay we just didn't like to ask".
But thanks for your response ... but being a camp, attention seeking straight guy is not gonna get the girls banging down my door! LOL
Why not?
My brother in his younger days was extremely camp - he had stacks of girlfriends.
As for looking at pictures of blokes - so what! No harm in looking - I can appreciate a picture or the sight of a nice looking girl.
You could be the other way inclined but subconcioulsy feel embarrassed or 'it's not quite right'
Or you could like the fantasy of maybe being non-straight.
However your last sentence about not getting 'the girls banging down my door' implies you would prefer girls and not blokes to be banging down your door - so you are straight! (Maybe bi-curious?)
My brother in his younger days was extremely camp - he had stacks of girlfriends.
As for looking at pictures of blokes - so what! No harm in looking - I can appreciate a picture or the sight of a nice looking girl.
You could be the other way inclined but subconcioulsy feel embarrassed or 'it's not quite right'
Or you could like the fantasy of maybe being non-straight.
However your last sentence about not getting 'the girls banging down my door' implies you would prefer girls and not blokes to be banging down your door - so you are straight! (Maybe bi-curious?)
I dont know what the most accurate 'label' for you is but campness is not at all unappealing to women.........
Isn't Russell Brand a camp straight guy?
And I think Marc Bolan was straight but he was as a camp as they come.
Robert Plant camp and straight
David Walliams camp and at the last count straight.
And of course Kemal off Big Brother. Undeniably camp and from what I hear (mostly) straight!
Dont worry about it, its only a label.
Isn't Russell Brand a camp straight guy?
And I think Marc Bolan was straight but he was as a camp as they come.
Robert Plant camp and straight
David Walliams camp and at the last count straight.
And of course Kemal off Big Brother. Undeniably camp and from what I hear (mostly) straight!
Dont worry about it, its only a label.
Mate just go with the flow, try not to label yourself as one thing or the other just go with the flow. I've been told I'm camp by some people (I don't do it intentionally) and in my experience women love it lol although I am reformed and with a partner now. Just have a good time with men, women or both
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