his annoying ex

[jen85]

hiya, just wanted some advice. my bf and his ex have a child together and only ever see each other when he picks up his son for his access time. the thing is she keeps texting him and emailing him. last month she texted saying she misses him and although he didnt reply that night he emailed her the following day asking about it. he knows i got upset about this. she has her own bf but despite that keeps saying things that she shouldn't to my bf. he told her to stop because he saw how uncomfortable i was with the situation. i understand that they have to get on for the sake of the child and im fine with that but dont c why she needs to keep contacting him for no reason. today he left his facebook account open and she had sent him some messages to which he had replied. she was obviously trying to flirt a bit and although it seems like he was chatting to her like a friend, he had added in some joking comments about their past. iv told him how i feel and he promises me he will never hurt me because im the one for him but i cant help but feel a bit uptight about her still feeling the need to talk to him for no reason. its like she still wants to flirt with him so that he remembers the time they had together. is anyone else in this situation? thanks

[xhxmxsx]

when i met my fiance he had been out of his relationship with his x for a few months, they have 2 children and he refused to speak to her unless it was an emergency, she started spreading a rumor a few months after we got together saying he was trying to get in her knickers in the first few months of being with me, when i found out i questioned her about it she looked petrified i stood up to her as my partner wouldnt for sake of losing contact. we now get on well and she has left me and my partner to it

[garry745]

I've been apart from my ex for 6 years, but still get her now and again turning to me for advice. Is sometimes to do with her relationship with her new fella.

Way I've dealt with it was to be open about it with my partner. Told her about it very early on and have always involved her in it. Is done mainly by text messages, so my partner always sees what I'm receiving and what I'm sending back. Is nothing to be secretive about, so my partner doesn't feel threatened by it.

My ex and I have three kids, so things are better if we can behave like adults and be friendly. As far as I'm concerned, we were together a long time and I probably know her better than anyone. She's always valued my advice and knows I won't just say something back because I think it's what she wants to hear. Was one time when I felt she was flirting because things weren't exactly happy in her relationship, but I nipped that in the bud immediately. Never happened again.

I guess some people feel the need to keep in touch with their ex's or seek advice from them. Each to their own I say. I don't as I'd turn to my partner for any advice I need, but doesn't mean my ex is wrong for how she deals with things.

[taperface]

Obviously, the fact that there is a child involved means that the absent parent needs to keep in regular contact. However, it seems to me that this lady IS missing her ex, for whatever reasons. If you love and trust your partner, then try not to get too worried about the flirting, but it's your boyfriend who needs to be kind, but firm. He should tell his ex. that he'll be there for their child - but nothing more. If he can'r do this for you, then maybe you've picked the wrong man.