Film, Media & TV0 min ago
Long distancing
5 Answers
my boyfriend of 8 months is leaving to college few states away. quite depressing for our relationship. do you think this could work? we want to stay together because we love each other and know our love is bigger than any distance. any ideas on this, or comments?
have you done it? helllp.
have you done it? helllp.
Answers
Best Answer
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Long distance relationships (LDR) can work, but there are some that don�t. It just depends on the people involved, and how much trust there is, and willingness to make things work. You have to accept that he will be meeting new people, and having lots of new experiences, it might also change him a bit but that is not to say your relationship could not sustain all these things. The hardest part will be that he will be doing all this whilst you are seemingly stuck in the �old life�.
If your relationship feels as strong as you say then why not give it some time, such as a semester or two, make some pact that you correspond (write letters, email, text etc) or talk on a regular basis and take time to meet up. Maybe take turns to visit each other, and make regular arrangements to meet somewhere in the middle. After this time you can see how you both feel about the LDR and whether your relationship still has some mileage. Remember you need a lot of trust, respect and love to make things work even if you are living out of each others pockets, so if the LDR doesn�t really work then chances are that the relationship may not have lasted anyway.
I am aware that the above may sound a bit harsh and foreboding, but as I said they can work and many do, but you need to be pragmatic about life also and lead your own whilst he is leading his.
If your relationship feels as strong as you say then why not give it some time, such as a semester or two, make some pact that you correspond (write letters, email, text etc) or talk on a regular basis and take time to meet up. Maybe take turns to visit each other, and make regular arrangements to meet somewhere in the middle. After this time you can see how you both feel about the LDR and whether your relationship still has some mileage. Remember you need a lot of trust, respect and love to make things work even if you are living out of each others pockets, so if the LDR doesn�t really work then chances are that the relationship may not have lasted anyway.
I am aware that the above may sound a bit harsh and foreboding, but as I said they can work and many do, but you need to be pragmatic about life also and lead your own whilst he is leading his.
probably different if your in the usa with the massive distances involved compared to here in the uk. but i met my fiancee on the net, we live 130 miles apart, we've been together 5 years now, see each other every weekend without fail, either i go to hers or she visits mine. i did move in with her 2 years ago but couldn't find any work in her area so now i work in my home town mon to thurs then travel back to hers thu evening to mon morning.
it can work as long as you think the persons worth it and your prepared to put some effort in.
it can work as long as you think the persons worth it and your prepared to put some effort in.
When I met my 'now' husband, I almost didn't carry on the relationship as he was in the Army and based in Germany. He came back to UK every few weeks for a long weekend, but it felt like it might be too much for us to handle!
But we kept going and he is now out of Army and home all of the time! We lasted the distance and I'm glad I gave it a go!
I would give it a go, but keep in mind that both of you might change and become different people (especially as he is going to college), this will cause more probalems than the distance!
As long as you both remain open and honest you both should be fine!
Good luck x
But we kept going and he is now out of Army and home all of the time! We lasted the distance and I'm glad I gave it a go!
I would give it a go, but keep in mind that both of you might change and become different people (especially as he is going to college), this will cause more probalems than the distance!
As long as you both remain open and honest you both should be fine!
Good luck x