Is it stupid to tell someone you love them ?

[Redrum]

Even when its 'over'.....

[lardhelmet]

Yes - especially when it's over...

[ummmm]

I suppose it depends on who finished it....

[Redrum]

Darn it......better keep some dignity then, and not let my true feelings out....

[lardhelmet]

Defo Red - can only lead to (more) tears before bedtime

[ummmm]

But what if the other person loves you back?

[cherrychapstick]

yes if you tell them you love them after you have broke up then you are just setting yourself up for a fall ,if she/he finished with you and they love you they will be back,if not then put it down to experience and move on

[Redrum]

This is the big problem Ummmmm....i know they do....but to just wait and wait, Im stubborn and so are they...what to do.....last contact was couple of months ago..in a quandry now....

[lardhelmet]

So you broke up for no reason then Red? Something must have caused the breakup.

[cherrychapstick]

a few months ,thats different ,send a message just one though and say hi break the ice ,

good luck red

[ummmm]

What have you got to lose?

[Redrum]

it's very complicated...long story...do most people split without at least giving each other a chance to talk about the split and why ?

[lardhelmet]

It's been known to happen...

[Redrum]

Trouble is Im stubborn, I want to 'break the ice' but am afraid of the fall and dont want to lose my pride....so maybe i shouldnt - just let it go.....its a sign of weakness if i tell him...

[cherrychapstick]

not most ,but i guess some do ,if they are scared ie things getting too serious and they think that is the best way they know if they talk then it wont be over if that makes sense

[lardhelmet]

It depends why you broke up. If he was unfaithful, can you ever trust him again? If you were, he's obviously going to have the same trust issues

[Redrum]

No affairs, no unfaithfullness, it ended abruptly, he has issues, as in slightly disordered personality...like i said it was complicated...but i cant help but still love him. Let sleeping dogs lie...

[Redrum]

Insecure, jealous, controlling...narcisstic....but there are two sides to every story....

[Mamyalynne]

If you feel you can love him complete with all the issues and make a long term go of it, then tell him you Love him. If the issues are a problem and you can`t then move on.

Good Luck

M

[cherrychapstick]

did he actually end it?as in say it was finished