sex with a married man

[ooh-la-la]

I meet a guy 4 weeks ago, went on a date with him and we got on really well. On the second date we had sex i began to like him even more. I meet him for the third time yesterday and after we had sex he told me he was married. I felt so crap, i just don't know what to do, i stayed with him for about a hour after he told me (without having sex) and he explained everything to me, even though he loves her they're sex life is rubbish, so he just needs someone to fill in that part. I don't really want a lot of commitment and i know if he's not doing it with me he'll find someone else, but then i keep thinking about his wife in the back of my mind. Owww, what a mess, i just don't know what to do what would you do if you were me?

[Greedyfly]

I don't have kids Cazzzz and I don't want to have any, neither does my partner. Open relationships are not for everyone.

The boundaries would be obvious for me any ways. Always use protection, get tested regular, there would be set days that you would spend away from each other, and I wouldn't want to know what was going on or with whom. But as I say I have been with the same person for nine or so years now and we are happy as we are.

I am not a jealous person at all. I am also not one of those women who insist on knowing where my partner is and who he's with - I trust him and his judgement, even though we are a couple we are still seperate people who do our own thing.

[ethandron]

wish someone would come up with those flags which attach to car windows which say ' I HATE FOOTBALL'

[ummmm]

It's ok in theory.....reality kicks in after.

[cazzz1975]

you sound very young greedyfly..

[ummmm]

And naive....

[LoftyLottie]

The very thought of Mr LL with another woman would makes me feel dreadful. I just couldn't bare it.

[Greedyfly]

So because I am young I am stupid?

[cazzz1975]

well your not bowling me over thus far....

[LoftyLottie]

I'm not at all jealous though. When he is away I don't even think of him being with others and he has spent lots of time away during our marriage. I'm not at all clingy.

[ummmm]

I didn't say stupid...you just sound naive...

[LoftyLottie]

I really can't see how open marriages/relationships can work. I often think people will say they work but that one of the partners only says so because they are afraid of losing the other. I just couldn't sleep with my husband if I thought he was comparing me with someone else and quite honestly that must happen in open marriages.

[Greedyfly]

I don't see why my age is relevant. Are you trying to tell me that if I were say forty years old I would have a different view?

Just because society has shown us how relationships should be doesn't mean its for everyone. I am not saying it would work for everyone, but I can't see a problem with it myself.

http://www.lifeslittl...o-be-monogamous-0297/

[cazzz1975]

go for it, give us a progress report in a years time :)

[ummmm]

So why not try it?

[ummmm]

lol cazzzzzzzzzzzz...

[Greedyfly]

I entered this relationship knowing what my partner wanted and that's how it is. As I have said before we are happy as we are. We have discussed our relationship in depth many times and have agreed that its better this way.

As for the sarcasm, each to their own. I am not making fun out of the fact that you don't think it will work. Everyone has the own ideas and feelings toward relationships. I just don't see how a couple can stay together and be happy for a lifetime without wanting or needing something your partner cannot give you. There is no such thing as a perfect match in my opinion.

Just for research purposes and the fact that you believe my age makes me naive, how old are you both?

[LoftyLottie]

Greedyfly. I agree that there is no such thing as a perfect marriage, (and don't I know it). But do you really think that both of you having different sexual partners whilst maintaining a relationship would work. I honestly don't see how it can. Not because I am old fashioned or prudish. Surely if you love someone and enjoy sex with that person you could not bare to think of them with someone else. I know I couldn't. It's not exactly jealousy either. It's just to me that sex is the most special thing you can have between two people and I would feel totally betrayed.

[cazzz1975]

you never told us your age greedy, besides I am not pouring water on your idea's, infact I asked for a progress report.

good luck, have fun and stay safe :)

[Greedyfly]

I am 27 Cazzzz - and you?

[ummmm]

I'm 36 if that makes a difference...