Men!

[JanineG]

I'm sorry - have to have a rant and nobody else to talk to at the moment - I've just come home from a full day's work to find that my other half has left his greasy dishes and frying pans in the sink and left the rest of the house in a complete mess. He's now gone to work and I'm left having to do all the cleaning after a stressful day!

(I work 40 hours a week, he works 25 hours a week). Is this fair? No ! and nothing worse than coming home to a mess. I have no objection to working more hours but I don't see why I should have to do all the household stuff as well! really vexed at the moment!

Thanks for letting me rant - I'm going to go and open a bottle of wine I think !

[winny]

You rant away honey if it makes you feel better. We are listening. Well I am.

[My Angel Pie]

Hi Janine, you go girl! hope the bottle of wine is taking it's effect. I'm right there with you on that one. after many years of such things i do now believe men just don't 'see the mess'. and if you do point it out they make you feel like you are nagging. So you can't win!

[Dusty Bin]

Leave the dishes tonight, but take it easy on the drink.

Wait until he gets back from work then wash them together (you wash, he dries...or vice versa)

Splash him a wee bit with the bubbles...then a bit more...and a bit more. He'll splash you back no doubt. By the time all the dishes are done you'll both be soaked and will have to go upstairs and take your clothes off...and need I say more? That'll help to relieve the stress!

This will show him you can do things together and have more fun than when you expect each other to do things on your own while the other one of you is out at work.

Good luck!

[joko]

here's a novel idea...leave it!


leave it until he gets home and let him do it. you don't HAVE to tidy up...the place won't explode if you don't - and nor will you.

you may not like it but as soon as he realises you are not going to clean up after him, he will stop doing it.

if you are so fussy that you just have to, just collect all the mess up and put it beside and on his side of the bed.

[sarnieken]

As Oprah once said, ditch that Zero and get yourself a hero!

just kidding, If you normall share the duties then clean them but make sure he knows he is responsible for doing something else. If he moans then stop washing his pots up. Also, tell him to get a job with more hours, the lazy a*se! Maybe he'll realise that you don't appreciate coming home to cr*p like that.

Forgive me, am having a day where I don't understand how some of us fellas can really be complete a*seholes.

[JOEYGREEN]

Well my fiance is exactly the same. Although we work similar hours, I also look after my son and do the house work etc. His only job is the washing up. He always leaves them and its disgusting. One day I decided that if he doesn't do the pots then I don't make him dinner the next night. It certainly works.

[annierak]

i was told my 'dearly beloved' (not) partner that it was his job to make the mess and mine to clear it up.

now, im not at all houseproud and hate doing chores, but the house is reasonably clean and tidy.
one christmas eve, while doing the final cleanup before the guests arrived, that i was being obsessive about it all.

me obsessive about housework???? never in a month of sundays.

he still makes most of the mess though.. i think its a man thing.. they just dont see it. the mess that is.

h.x

[WendyS]

Just leave the saucepans and dirty dishes in the sink until mould grows in them, even if it means eating sandwiches for every meal until they're cleaned away. And leave his laundry unwashed too.
I think sharing housework is about agreement and compromise but iftsounds as if he just wants a housekeeper. I wouldn't rant and rave at him. Just quietly go about looking after your own needs until the message gets through.