small children and bedtime!

[alexey]

my youngest daughter is two and a half now and still sleeps between me and her dad. you see, she was poorly when she was three weeks old and needed an operation and ever since then we have felt sorry for her and let her get her own way. she isnt naughty or anything she just screams the place down if i put her in her own bed. can someone please give me some tips on how to get her sleeping on her own quickly please? HELP!

[dilf]

my youngest is 12 and he still gets in our bed no harm done we just got a bigger bed.

[petekeith]

Ok we had this problem ask her what she would like i.e doll, dvd, etc.

Then make a chart and say each night she stays in her own bed she will get a star and when she gets 7 she gets her present then make the next one 14 nights and so on.

If that does work get her a bunk bed and stick her on top.

Good Luck

[loobie]

Why don't you try a special bed. My nephew always wanted to sleep in with his parents until they bought him a bed that looks like a car!! Sometimes a little bribery has to be done!!

[ronnie963]

i have a 12, 9 and a 5 year old and every morning i wake up with them all in my bed thank your lucky stars you,ve only got the one. I just see it like this, they won,t be doing it when they are 16.

[meltoadhall]

its all very well saying that it does no harm, but what about your love life? have you seen your health visitor about what you are obviously seeing as a problem now.

the alternatives are as the others have said, star charts etc.. or what most people do with their toddlers take her back to her own bed over and over and over again every night until she gets the message and just reasure her that you are not far away. dont give her any eye contact or treats just lie her down say goodnight and leave. usually take s up to a week. good luck

[noxlumos]

"Don't give any eye contact"??? won't that just petrify the kid, it's parent's suddenly behaving bizarrely?

What works for us ( we have 8 kids) is buy them their own bed, let them choose the duvet cover etc make it their special bed, and then make them going into their bed a really nice thing. Go up an hour early the first few nights and watch a dvd with them, read a book, tell them their favourite story or sing to them until they sleep. Takes a while the first 2 or 3 nights, but that way it's a pleasant experience and never becomes a battle of wills or a frightening experience. Then in the morning make a great big fuss about what a good little person they are and reward them with something, a small toy, new book, whatever, that way their own bed is encouraged and they love it. We've never had any problem with the transition and all of our kids have slept in our bed until anything from 18 months to 3 years old.

[tigilou]

This sounds like my daughter we have just had exactly the same thing. On friday she got her new bed in her own room she is 2 and slept with us but she would climb out of her cot into our bed.

Anyway i agree totally with noxlumos this has been a hard weekend but last night she slept through we have told her she has got a big girls bed and have put pink fury lights in her room that she turns on when she goes up to bed and gets in her special balamory bed covers. At first she kept getting out of bed and i just kept putting her back in as she wanted me to lay with her. Last night was a breakthrough and she didnt move and slept all night i have basically done what noxlumos has said and it will work eventually. even though i was up until half 1 putting her back in her bed each time she got out but it has paid off fingers crossed for tonight anyway. Good luck

[dove]

When I saw the your question alexey I got myself all wound up straight away thinking that there would be aload of do gooders answers saying children should not be sleeping with their parents etc
how refreshing that all the answers given have been made by 'real people'
How right ronnie963 is..... well done all
;-D

[alexey]

i have actually got two children, my other daughter is six now and she slept in bed with me until she was one and a half, but when i felt the time was right to put her in her own bed she went in no trouble.

[nfn]

my boy is 6 and gets in with me at some point every night. I thought if I then got out of bed and got in his he would follow me back then I could leave him there. Not a chance. He did follow me back to his bed, then followed me again when I got in my own again! I don't think it's a problem at all, he says he just likes to be able to cuddle me if he wants to during the night. However, if he has a sleepover at Nanna and Grandad's house he sleeps in his own bed no problems, always has done!