Help with a clingy Daughter

[prestondad]

I am currently divorced and my daughter stays with my ex wife. I have 2 hours contact with my daughter every other Saturday. However when my ex tries to leave the contact centre wy daughter is so upset and just wants her mummy. it makes me feel so upset to see her that upset and that she wants to just be with her mummy.
Is there anything that i can do to help in this situation? i am trying to get more unsupervised contact with my daughter and at the end of this i want to have joint custody of my daughter.

[sandbach99]

How old is your daughter? all children go through phases of not wanting to go to another person except Mum.

If your daughter is young she may not remember you from week to week, I know that sounds cruel but 2 hours weekly is not much time in your daughters life.

Are you reasonably friendly with your ex, her mum, if so can you ask her to show her your photo daily and explain to your daughter that you are not a stranger to fear.

The more you see her the more she will accept you don't give up.

[silkychicken]

Yeah, whatever happens don't give up on your daughter. At some point you may think she'd be better if you didn't put her through this upset, but in the long run that would be the worst thing. You're her dad and she'll never have another. I bet the problem is that you only get to see her for such a short time, and that the visits are so far apart. She might be thinking of you a bit like a stranger and would obviously be more comfortable with her mother as she's with her all the time.
Are you not allowed to see her more often? Would her mother not be willing for you to see her more - to try to make it easier and not so upsetting for the daughter she loves too?
I don't know all the story from both sides, I know but this little girls needs are the most important thing, and both you and your wife should keep this in mind when sorting this out. Try to put any ill feeling if there is any, aside for her sake

[prestondad]

Thank you for your help.

I have tried everything i can to try and get my ex wife to help with this but she won't.
She seems to enjoy seeing me upset and that my daughter only wants to be with her.
We are still going to Court with regards to contact of my daughter and at the end i want joint custody of my daughter.

[silkychicken]

Your ex-wife is probably feeling very smug when your daughter seems to want to go with her. She obviously doesn't realise it doesn't mean that your daughter prefers her, but rather that your daughter is more familiar with her because of the day to day contact they have. Unfortunately this means she has an unfair advantage over you. But don't take a step back and give up or she'll have won in this very unfair situation. Stick with it and hopefully it'll all work out the best for your daughter. You'll be glad in the end. Anything worth having is worth fighting for.

[prestondad]

Good Morning Thank you again for your kind words.

I tried speaking with my ex last night ( waste of time )
saying does my daughter have a picture in her room of me? she said yes but i don't belive her for one minute, i also asked about more contact NO was the ans also going to see a child psychologst? that just made things worse she went off the handle. I am only try my best to do what i can with regards to my daughter i miss being with her i miss everyday life with her and love her more than anything in the world i would die for her. Yes it was my fault the the marrage broke down but things happen in life.
I don't suppose you know of any site that deal with child psychology?

Thankk you so much again ;-)

[silkychicken]

Why do you feel she needs a psychologist? Children are very resiliant and if you can get the courts to agree on you having more contact, I think that will solve the problem.