Staying in bed

[Jesse's Mom]

Since my son has graduated to a toddler bed he won't go to sleep in his bed. After he falls asleep on me I carry him to his bed. Then in the middle of the night he comes in my room and gets in bed with me which I have never allowed before. I don't want to start that but if I carry him back to his bed he screams forever. What can I do?

[puffinjohn]

sounds kinda familiar. Well me and my wife cant be bothered to fight it - and to be honest quite like having our youngest in bed with us. I know we should really put our foot down but then we never did with our eldest daughter and she's turned out ok. I wouldnt worry about it unless its really bothering you.

[dragonfly]

Awww bless ..... Your son is probably scared when he wakes up as he remembers falling asleep in your arms then waking up in his bed .... you should make a bed time routine bath, story time then put him in his bed and stay with him till he goes to sleep, will probably take a few nights to get him in a routine but it should work. hope this helps you x

[MrsCheeks]

Spray lavender into the air and onto the bedclothes to help him relax, and invest in a nightlight. Hope this helps. xxx

[Lindy Loo]

I had a similar problem with my son (now 19!!). He would only go to sleep if I held him and the moment I moved he woke up! I ended up doing what dragonfly's suggested, but once he got used to that, I gradually sat further away from him after the story, till eventually he went to sleep on his own. I left his door ajar and the landing on. Has the bed got any sides or guard rail? Maybe he feels insecure in an 'open space'? Also have there been any other changes to his routine that are causing him to be 'clingy'...new baby, new house, starting playgroup etc?

[EssJay1]

Definitely a change of routine is in order. I agree with dragonfly. Your child needs to learn to fall asleep on his own, in his own bed and preferably without you doing anything for him. Then if he wakes in the night, as we all do, he can just roll over and go back to sleep.

[Jesse's Mom]

Thank you for your advice. He had been going to sleep by himself since he was 3 months old. There has been a change in the house though. My 12 year old daughter was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes last month. I spent the week she was in the hospital spending the nights with her and the days with him. Maybe this could have something to do with it. Our family has changed since she got home. We now have sugar to check and shots to give. Maybe it has affected him more than I thought.

[Lindy Loo]

I'm really sorry to hear about your daughter, it must have been very worring for you. Sounds like you've found the 'problem' though. This is probably to do with all the extra attention your daughter got/is getting, and in his way, your son is possibly insecure/jealous at the moment. Another thing. Did his bedtime routine change while you were at the hospital? He obviously missed you and perhaps all he needs is a few extra cuddles, just to reassure him mum is not going to leave him. I really hope that your son settles again soon, and that your daughter gets on ok.

[nettinoo]

hope everything is going a bit better

my friend has been using a relaxation cd from relax kids - they do have a website and you can get loads of free relaxations to read out to your child - hope that is a help