A hitting child!!

[tgm1974]

Can anyone tell me if their child still hits.

My son will turn 3yrs old in November and he will hit out whether he is playing or he is annoyed. Even last night when I put him back to his bed at 2.30am he lashed out at me, hitting me in the eye. He will play kick too when Im getting him undressed especially if I have him lying on the bed!

Ive tried to do all the “no its naughty to hit” and even pretended to be hurt (and cry) but to no avail. The funny thing is that when he randomly hits on other occasions he apologises straight away!

Any hints or tips to get this to stop … or shall I let it run with age?

[B00]

I'm with Sqad (Christ, twice in one day!)

I'd wallop him, twice as hard and then put him in his room for a couple of minutes, until I'd calmed down!

[Sqad]

BOO....you didn´t tell me that you liked a bit of S&M........we have more in common than you think ;-)

[B00]

S&M? We're talking about disciplining children here Sqad....

I like the reasoning with them idea in theory, but i'm afraid im still with the old fashioned idea in principle that if you do something wrong, you're punished.

My daughter's 5, and is usually pretty good on a day to day basis, but she knows that if she pushes me too far, i can and will smack her, and I frankly don't care if this is PC or not. It means that I have a happy, well behaved (again mostly) polite child who was described by her teacher on her school report as "a delight to teach" so i don't think im doing too much wrong.

[LoftyLottie]

You should get together and have kids. Poor little buggers !! ;o)

[woofgang]

so its okay to teach that its okay to hit back then?

[Sqad]

BOO...it was a bloody joke...................forget it.

[LoftyLottie]

(You know I don't mean it BOO!) I am sure you are a lovely Mum and mini BOO is a total delight. The only time I struck out at my son he was 14 and giving me a lot of lip, and we both ended up laughing because by the time my hand reached his face all he got was a little tiny slap. I just can't hit people!!

[B00]

Sorry lottie and woofgang, you bring your children your way and I will do it my way.

As I've said , i have a happy ,well adjusted child who clearly knows right from wrong. She knows what she can and can't do,and this is achieved by telling, advising and as a last resort -smacking.

[B00]

Bad Lottie!

:P

[Sqad]

woofgang, whichever method of teaching children discipline we have, in my opinion, a more violent generation of children.

Something is not working.

[woofgang]

and that answer BOO is quite a way removed from " I'd wallop him twice as hard then put him in his room till I had calmed down"

[B00]

Possibly woofgang, but in all honesty, if she'd kicked me in the eye she would need putting in her room for her own safety!

[LoftyLottie]

I seriously can't smack though BOO. I just can't. Well except for Mr LL! It's not so much an anti smacking thing because there are occasions when a smack perhaps is necessary, but all I can achieve is tiny little slap.

[Mamyalynne]

Oh she was sqad I assure you and she has not misbehaved at the table since, plus I had the satisfaction that comes with perseverance, Also I reheated my meal and naughtily ate it with a tray on my knees at the computer when they had gone home LOL

[LoftyLottie]

,............... hence why my son laughed at me and I ended up laughing as well. I suppose I was lucky, he was a doddle as a little kid, but at 13 and 14 hit that lippy stage. Mind you, compared to what some kids are like.......................... He's more awkward at 27 than he was at 2 or 3.

[TTG]

Are there any treats you can withdraw? Chocolate, outings, toys etc.
The alternative is a 'short, sharp, shock'. Smack on hand or bottom never did myself and brothers any harm. I could go down the "that's what the kids of today need" route but there are too many people against this.

[piggynose]

not sure if a 3yr old would understand it, but what about taking away treats, eg sweets, puddings, favourite toys.

[B00]

Honestly Woofgang and Lottie, as glib as my initial reply might have been, i genuinely don't smack Mini Boo often. I have to be severely provoked to do so, and it's always just a smack across the backs of legs or bottom if i can get to it.

I was going to say i can't remember when i did last smack her, but then i remembered it was in town the other day (i made sure no one else saw me do it- it looks so chavvy!), she'd generally been a brat all the way round each and every shop and eventually walking home as she was in mid rant/tantrum/sulk i smacked the backs of her legs.

Now to get back to the initial question by the OP. I fail to see why a tap across the backs of the legs might not be effective. Afterall, she's tried everything else by the sound of it and sod all else seems to work!

[woofgang]

sorry BOO and actually while I do agree with your last post...PO actually hasn't tried the naughty step and followed through and she hasn't tried withdrawing attention.

[looby1914]

If your going to use strategies like the naughty step then you have to be persistant and follow it through no matter how many times the child gets up..

I give my son warnings 1-3 when i get to the end of 2 i say "if i get to 3 you WILL be going on the naughty spot" with a firm voice and strict face.. It took him time to learn but i just repeatedly sat him back down and said nothing.