Getting Pregnant At 40

[black_cat51]

hi, i would like to ask what the general opinion is about older mums. My family feels as if it could do with another person in it, but i am now 40 and i wonder about any baby feeling pretty miffed about having such a geriatric mum. I know people are having their babies later as a general trend (look at halle berry!), but i do worry that people will think i'm odd

[black_cat51]

one

[chrissa1]

Speaking as a Baby Boomer, women didn't have the option to have a family early, because of the war. Go for it.

[black_cat51]

perhaps i'll just go with the cat option :P no messy squelchiness to endure

[sherrardk]

Oh, I thought to was more (from your profile and previous questions).

[black_cat51]

no, just the one :)

[sherrardk]

Just be aware that the 'risk' of multiple births rises in the 'older' mother.

[jamesnan]

My mum had my half sister, when I already had 3 daughters, the youngest of whom was 2. It was lovely having her into the family, and she feels as though my daughters are more like her sisters as well, of the same sort of age. Go for it !

[black_cat51]

really? I'd never heard that - yikes!

[sherrardk]

Neither had I until I had twins at 39!

[starone]

My youngest brother was born when I was eighteen and my mother was 44. He was the pet of the family and made a great fuss of, in fact we all spoiled him. When he got older though, he did not go to my mother for advice or to tell about his successes and failures, he came to me. I was more like the age of his contemporaries mothers. Perhaps this was a good thing, like having two mothers and he was in fact very successful (I am very proud of him). He is retired now and still living the good life because his success meant he has a good pension. So I think on the whole to have a baby when you are forty depends on you and your partner. You can make a success of the whole thing if you are willing to give up your time and life to the baby.

[black_cat51]

that must have been a surprise

[sherrardk]

Ginormous surprise - especially as I had a 7 year old, 4 year old and 2 year old already (lady doing the scan asked if twins ran in the family, which I said no to, then a couple of minutes later I remembered (whilst crying my eyes out) that I am also a twin). Himself laughed hysterically for about a month.

[boingo]

I've just seen this and was going to say pretty much what Old Geezer said.

However, I got married in my late 30's and didn't have my two children until I was 32 and 35, thanks to lots of tests, fertility drugs and 'getting in on'!

It is riskier, may take longer to conceive, very tiring and there will be a few older Mum's at the school gates. If having another child at 40 is what you and your husband really want, I wish you lots of luck.

[boingo]

Sherrardk, that is so funny!

[Peter Pedant]

If you wanna,
go ahead.

My lady mother was 42, ( and now I am retired ) .
War thing - my eldest brother is 3y 9 mo older than me and there are two in between.

No one will think you are odd - just go ahead.

[ShadowPuppet]

There is nothing odd about having a child at 40, my aunt did. Her daughter/my cousin is 15 now and they're relationship is like any mother and daughter.

[belrec]

I too had my second bundle at 40. He is now nearly 5 and started school this year. My oldest is 8.

I felt my second pregnancy was easier in some ways, as you know what to expect, but it was definitely more tiring and also you have your first little to consider too.

As for being an older school mum doesnt bother me and the kids don't even notice, think of all the life experience you have now compared to your 20's or 30's I certainly wouldn't have made as good a parent then as i think i am now :-)

[anneasquith]

if you have to give the issue a lot of thought, maybe its not for you or your family.

[black_cat51]

maybe it might be better if more people gave it a lot of thought before they got up the duff anneasquith

[anneasquith]

had no wish to upset you sorry, but if you are unsure it may not be what is best for you/family. :(