Getting Pregnant At 40

[black_cat51]

hi, i would like to ask what the general opinion is about older mums. My family feels as if it could do with another person in it, but i am now 40 and i wonder about any baby feeling pretty miffed about having such a geriatric mum. I know people are having their babies later as a general trend (look at halle berry!), but i do worry that people will think i'm odd

[Prudie]

Loads of women have babies over 40 including first babies. Geriatric you are not. I suppose there are a few more concerns healthwise but if it's what you want I don't see 40 as a barrier at all.

[Maydup]

My head says get a cat, my heart says go with your heart.

[sherrardk]

I was 39 (and my husband was (a young) 50) on my last pregnancy - lots of things to consider, greater chance of multiple birth, more problems with pregnancy, greater risk of the baby having birth defects, more tired, etc, etc. It's your call but I don't regret having thing 1 and thing 2 (to add to my three other children).

[ferlew]

It really does not matter what others think.
If you and partner are happy about another little person in your family, that is your business.
These days we all live a lot longer anyway, so not as if your possible child will be on it's own at age ten.
Good luck.

[sherrardk]

Ps - I am also the oldest mum in the playground (but fortunately don't look it!).

[EDDIE51]

You will be able to apply for your pension at the same time your child is applying for his her student loan.

[Prudie]

I doubt it Eddie, by then the pension age will probably have been raised to 75!

[sherrardk]

My husband can apply for his pension when thing 1 and 2 are still in primary school. Some people are just younger somehow than others of the se age as them.

[Jeza]

Not nice Eddie, not nice at all.

[EDDIE51]

Purdie the school leaving age will be around 30 by then anyway! School > Uni > Pension all in one seamless sequence , solve the unemployment problem all at the same time.

[boxtops]

black_cat - your point about the baby's viewpoint is worth thinking about (not so much what other people think). 55 years ago (when it was very unusual) my mother gave birth to my brother when she was 47. Mr brother never commented to me about it but mum said she felt sure that he was self-conscious about having a mother at school events who was twice the age of all the other mums.

However - this probably wouldn't be so significant or noticeable now, since grans and mothers dress much more informally and age is difficult to guess - and lots of little 'uns are looked after by grandmothers in the day.

Please be assured that 40's not old. Your new baby will have left school before you are 60 - and 60's not old, either. If you want to increase your family, go for it. It's nobody's business but yours.

[phleb]

You go girl, get pregnant, you can never stop tongues wagging!! A lot of colleagues I know have sorted their careers and having kids at 40+, if they are happy with it, who are we to judge.xx

[phleb]

Eddie, be nice x

[ferlew]

Good post Boxtops. :)

[pixie373]

If you feel it's right for you and your family, you go for it. As others have said, people live a lot longer, trends are changing,it's not that unusual. More important it's loved and wanted.

[jim360]

40 isn't really that old. I have a cousin who's either 4 or 5 whose Mum is the wrong side of 50 currently.

[Old_Geezer]

It's a personal choice but the point has been made that whilst 40 doesn't seem a big deal whilst the baby is being contemplated, you do need to be aware you will remain an older parent and all that entails. If pushed I'd say 40 is probably under a reasonable limit, but not by much. A decade later and I'd advise differently. Anyway I'd be more concerned that you are making a decision based on what your family wants rather than what you want.

[black_cat51]

i probbaly put it wron in the setence construction - instead of sayind "my family feels as if it could do with another person" i should have said "it feels as if my family could do with another person in it"

[sherrardk]

How many children do you already have (if you don't mind me asking).