Keeping A Death From The Family,feedback Plz.

[prendi]

My sister in law died a couple of weeks ago from cancer.The first I knew of it when I saw the obituary in the paper!!We have not visited my brother for a couple of years,just sent xmas cards etc.the rest of the family are the same,dont keep in touch etc,and they didn't know about her death either,til they saw it in the paper.apparently my sister in law didn't want my brother to tell any one about her illness or her death,but surely we should have been informed of her death if only to pay our respects,what do you think??

[Connemmara]

Jeza - I don't feel concerned for you just sad and I truly mean that :(

[tamborine]

Irish funerals are huge events; high mass with church bursting at seams. The wake often has more than 200+ peeps in a hotel or such. All generations and friends usually attend and no invitations are necessary. I think prendi is irish ?

[Jeza]

Conne. You don't have a clue what I'm speaking of.

[Connemmara]

Prendi the best information I was given years ago was I am of course RC - (don't practise enough tho) always pray for peace of mind - cos it covers everything. God bless you tonight and remember it was taken out of your hands - nothing you could do about it.

Sorry Mamy for you too re your sad estranged loss whatever it may be.

[Connemmara]

Jeza oh but I do - I am assuming I am older and wiser than you.

[Jeza]

Older Conne, Maybe. Wiser, when you throw a wobbly regularly on here?

[Jeza]

Bed time.

[Connemmara]

Jeza you have thrown a wobbler yourself (take tonight eg).

[craft1948]

Conne I find your remarks about Jeza quite offensive and deeply patronising, you know nothing about her circumstances.

[Connemmara]

Craft - you don't know any of both our circumstances nor we don't know yours - after all we are all only ICONS. Not physically friends. But I know you won't think it I am genuinely sad for Jeza when she wants such a lonely funeral etc. Can't comprehend that one. Sorry. My own family are pretty estranged - ie cards at Xmas etc etc - but when it comes to sickness and funerals etc - we all step up to the mark. We may not want to but we do.

[wolf63]

I don't care if anyone goes yo my funeral as, to me, it's not important. I have close family and close friends and they would need to be informed of my demise, if only to ensure my cats were cared for.

Everyone if different. My mum died in 1996 and I have never been to her grave grave and it is only a mile or so from here.

[wolf63]

Conne

I don't agree with your stance either. I would rather have a dozen real friends at my funeral than 200 people that I don't really know. And God isn't invited either.

[Mamyalynne]

None of us has the right to say which way anyone should deal with this - to each their own.

[Connemmara]

well wolfie as has been said on here many times - each to their own. May God bless you tonight xxxxx

[Connemmara]

mamy we have clashed.

[craft1948]

lol lol Conne you really take the biscuit don't you. Wolf mentions she doesn't want God at her funeral so what do you do...............

[Connemmara]

wolfie - final word -regarding the 200 hundred people there - he (brother knew them all) (remember he was professional singer ( and sang throughout the horrible troubles here in NI (gave his all in Protestant and Catholic) venues. And must admit both turned up. Isn't that nice. We can come together!

[wolf63]

craft -connes comment made me smile though, maybe a demented smile, but still a :-)

[Brinjal]

Yes don't make a big deal about it. Give your brother a ring and offer sympathy but don't take umbrage about not being informed.

[anneasquith]

I will not be happy unless the church is '' bursting at the seams '' for my funeral,,,,,,,,, because there will be steak pie and alcohol available :) :)