How is your whole family attitude in general? Does everyone get on usually?
You should be able to make it work by agreeing to each others personal preferences. A wedding does not make a bride "she who must be obeyed"!!
There are times in life when you have to comply - this is one of them and her chance to learn that this is so. I'm sure there are plenty of other girls who who just love to take her place.
Bunkmoreland - yes, the bride is "she who must be obeyed". It's her day and people are being invited to take part in it.
gosh here is another example of 'teenage rules ok?'. I'm a teenager( four times over ha ha) -and hate dresses and skirts, but if I go somewhere and there is a dress code I adhere to it -Its NOT her day! Tell her she has to wear the damn dress for the two hours it will take for the wedding, then she can change into something more comfortable for the evening reception/disco.
Whilst I would agree it is principally the bride's day, why not simply ask the two concerned parties if there is a compromise, assuming of course your daughter really does want to be involved. I used to dread being asked to be pageboy or some such thing by a misguided relative. I would not have cooperated in making me look foolish had they ever done so.
Perhaps a jumpsuit if she has the option but tend to agree that she wears what she's told. I don't suppose all feminine bridesmaids are happy in lilac satin monstrosities either but it's sometimes par for the course.
Sorry Old_Geezer but it is NOT the place of a teenage bridesmaid to negotiate Terms and Conditions of a wedding! IF I were the bride or brides mother I would simply say 'my way or the highway'
Old_Geezer Really? So next time I get invited into the Royal Box at Ascot I'll drop Queenie a line and ask if I can come in my jeans and tee shirt ' cos i feelz more comforty like'