Neighbours

[langara]

My friends neighbours are driving her mad. She is a spinster in her 60's, with numerous health problems, her new neighbours have 3 small children who she has tried to get on with, but their parents seem to delight in upsetting her. She has done everything they have asked of her, including replacing fences, having scaffolding on her land so that they can paint house walls. Her main problem is the constant kicking of a football against the new fence, that she could ill afford to replace. A lot of her plants are getting broken with the ball keep coming into her garden, when she asked for some consideration, the mother said she was a muppet, when the little boy asked what a muppet was his mom said an old person who had nothing better to do than complain. I have no idea how to help her and most days she has tears when telling me the next episode. She is very frail and has crohns disease, so all the agro is not helping. Any suggestions would be a help. Thanks

[Fusion5]

I agree Whirly, no respect for others in this world , some people think it's their God given right to wind others up.

[ummmm]

I live quite near 3 schools and in my experience children do have respect.

I think some of the older generation have forgotten what their childhood was really like, the games they played, the noise they made.

[Fusion5]

It's one thing to hear children playing, which is lovely to hear, but quite another thing to having the sh...t knocked out of your fence and plants.

What would you say if it was your Gran, ummmm, oh just get on with it, they are only kids.

[Mamyalynne]

Yes - lots of children are brought up to respect, some sadly aren't.


I often find if you did children an alternative rather than just a 'Stop it' it works better.

[Mamyalynne]

I would as said earlier , suggest a goal net, an old bin or bucket to aim the ball into instead of the fence.

[ummmm]

My nan wouldn't be bothered by it. My nan would probably play football with them.

[jennyjoan]

lost case in my estimation - if the lady complains - she will be troubled more with these morons. No Ummmmm we haven't forgotten how we played and I remember an old biddy - she came right out to the door and chased us and we chased.

[jennyjoan]

take it Ummmm - you dont live with your nan.

[Mamyalynne]

I was chased up the cobbles many a time by a neighbour wielding a broom , 1958 approx - nothing is new.

[ummmm]

Jenny....Yes I did live with my nan. She's a wonderful, kind, funny, lovely woman. She has taught me many many things in life, both practicable and fun.

[Elina]

Hi langara, this is the parents responsibility. When my son was young, he was told to keep the ball low, might have had to say it a few times. If it ever went over a garden I would confiscate it off them for that day. Everyone has a right to sit peacefully in their own garden. A parent needs to be consistent. This neighbour doesn't sound very reasonable at all. Your friend needs a person to speak to the council on her behalf of to go with.

[Retrochic]

If these are pre nursery children they can hardly be kicking a ball very hard and English weather being what it is,not every day. Older children will be a school and also probably have other things to do, preventing them kicking balls for hours on end. If it bothered me that much I'd go down to Argos and buy a cheap goal and give it to the children as a present,saying it would be better to kick the ball into the goal as their ball may get lost or broken if it goes in her garden. Probably too late for that if she's been confrontational with the neighbours, and if she's constantly in tears then maybe something else is going on in her life and this is just tipping the balance.

[Fusion5]

Very sensible answer Elina.

[Mamyalynne]

Glad you agree re the goal net Retrochic, I mentioned that on page one - seems sensible to me.

[jennyjoan]

Jenny....Yes I did live with my mum. She's a wonderful, kind, funny, lovely woman. She has taught me many many things in life, both practicable and fun. Exactly just like yours only she commanded respect from the young ones. I recall one wee fella called her by her first name and she nipped it in the bud - nicely she said my name is Mrs Jenny Joan - he never called her by hir first name ever again. In fact (those days doors were always open) they called in every day to see if she wanted errands (coulda laughed shop ws 2 doors up).

[Mamyalynne]

I had a Gran like that, she'd roll her frock up and tuck it in her bloomers to play - she once climbed onto the coal shed to rescue a ball and we had to get the chap next door to bring her down - she was 73.

[Fusion5]

It sounds like it has gone past buying goal nets, which aren't that cheap. If the mother has called this lady a muppet in front of her children, not even the England's team goal net will smooth the waves.

[Mamyalynne]

Oh dear - OK.

Fait accompli then is it?

[Retrochic]

I think being a 'Spinster' (what a silly word) probably has a lot to do with it. Probably best to just keep the balls -balls aren't cheap either so once they've lost around £10 quids worth they may decide to kick the ball on the other side of the garden.

[Ric.ror]

As I get older I want more 'quiet' time than I did when I was younger. If your friend lives in council property could she apply to be re-housed in over 55's housing?
Whatever happens I hope she gets some resolve to her problem