Is My Boyfriend A Pedophile?

[Jostina]

Hello, please help me. Me and my bf are both 23. We’ve been together for almost 2 years. I’m always a little anxious and get stressed over the slightest things. But I wanted to make sure of this so please give me your thoughts. Me and my bf love each other a lot and he’s so loving and caring. A year ago, he was talking about his 11 year old twin cousins(girls) and how they are different and he said one of them is curvy and the other is skinny, but I found that using “curvy” is inappropriate to describe an 11 year old but didn’t say anything. Yesterday he told me he was tickling one of them (they’re now both 12) and she refused and told him I’m all grown up now so don’t do this (this is the one he described as curvy last year) and then he told me he tickled the other one and she was okay with it and kept laughing. He also once told me he can’t imagine how both of them would grow one day and won’t be kids anymore and that he won’t be able to hold or hug them anymore (we’re in a western and religious country). Now he also always calls me baby or baby girl or baby “insert my nickname”. He also sometimes tells me he feels like I’m his daughter, when asked him why he told me that because he feels like he wants to take care of me and feed me, and protect me. He also tells me a lot how cute I am. Note: sometimes I do act like a little girl lol, and a friend once told me that too. So is it sth I should worry about? Could he be a pedophile or is this normal?

[bhg481]

I wouldn't have thought there was a problem. One of the difficult things with children is realising that they grow up; they do things one day that they consider to be childish the day after and you have to accept this. He will have played with his nieces from the day they were born and now one of them has decided she's too grown up for that sort of play; the other is still happy with it.

[Peter Pedant]

you are doubting your bf
change him for another one

if you dont trust him which you dont - - then it doesnt matter what the fact is

[William51]

Nothing to worry about. I looks like he is playful and happy, and he wants to care for you. He is still young so allow him his feelings while he matures.

[anneasquith]

The fact you should even ‘ think’ that is a possibility, move on he is not for you .

[Ellipsis]

Maybe he called her "curvy" because he didn't want to say "chubby" or "fat".

[ladybirder]

You are in doubt!
So, Get Out.

[bednobs]

Poor blokes. I feel so sorry that they can't even say curvy or play with their nieces without being accused of the worst. If that is your 'evidence' please dump him. He deserves much better than you

[pat2604]

Agree with Bednobs.

[ducksie]

He's definitly crossing the line with the cousins, he may not be paedophile but he's definitly getting better kick from tickling his cousins than they are, they are uncomfortable, if I was his aunt or uncle I would have him banned from seeing his cousins. Go get yourself a fella that doesn't freak out young girls

[davebro]

Both 23 - aren't you adult enough to have a conversation?

Ask him if he is attracted to underage females & if he is get him to address his feelings/behaviour before something untoward happens.

[rowanwitch]

I agree, have the conversation. Without making accusations, I think he will be offended, he may end it, but I don't think a relationship with such doubts so early on will go the distance.
I am more concerned that he seems to get off on treating you like is a child and you are playing along. This can be an early stage in creating a controlling and toxic relationship. That alone should ring alarm bells for your own term wellbeing.