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Glpblondie | 10:36 Sat 20th Nov 2010 | Family & Relationships
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My boyfriend calls his ex girlfriend babe? He has a child with her and refers to his ex as 'babe in the text messages he sends her. Its really upset me and he can't seem to understand what the big deal is? Do you think this is unacceptable behaviour? And in the same situation would you be upset?
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No...because my ex calls me babe and I've been split with him for over 16 years. He's also married with two more children. His wife doesn't seem to care. It's just a word.

Someone people call complete strangers darling, sweetheart etc etc.

How long have you been with him?
Hmm well I still call me ex 'lovely' in text messages such as ' How's it going then lovely?'
I think it depends very much how things ended with them, if it's all still very friendly and everyone has moved on then it's really quite a nice thing and no big deal- my ex has very definately moved on living with someone else and having had other children but still calls me 'sweetheart' both face to face and via text / email etc.
She has no intention of getting back together with me, she's very happy and we're now just really good friends, affection doesn't have to die just because you're no longer in a sexual relationship with someone- but if it upsets you a lot then explain to him exactly how much.
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been with him just over a year ummmm. NOX the relationship didn't end very well and he really can't stand her (supposedly), she still has feelings for him and hasn't moved on. This is why I can't understand why he uses the word babe?
Maybe it's what he always called her....maybe it's a bit of peace keeping...who knows.

Don't make an issue of it...because if this is an issue after just a year you could in for some hard times ahead.
Ah now I understand your problem a little more. I suspsect you suspect that he's using this as some manner of powerplay and you may be right. Talk it through with him as no amount of advice from us can get inside your bf's head and anything you do gleen from here might be sketchy at best, but that sounds distinctly less healthy than if it ended well, but then agan it might be habit and just terms he'd use to almost anyone.
Maybe he feels a bit guilty and is throwing her crumbs? Only you know if it's normal for him to use terms of affection like this - what does he call you? I work with someone who calls everyone darling but that's just their way.
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I am from an older generation that would find the use of the word babe to an adult odd.
BUT,the younger generation use it all the time,and so I cannot see what is the problem?
I think the problem lies more with you,and the fact that babe causes you to believe that there is still affection with her (on his part) when actually there isn't.
Life with a b/f who has an ex and child is never going to be easy,but don't make TOO much of a thing out of it or you may be an ex(soon) too!
I think that out of respect for you he should call her by here name as "babe? would've been one of his pet names for her whilst they were together and as they're not together anymore pet names should stop.
Some blokes call every girl they meet babe or honey and I hate it. Not because I find it offensive I just think it's a bit iffeminate (sp) and ghastly really. I cringe where I hear blokes say it to anyone who isn't there girlfriend.
Your boyfriend is out of order and obviously still has feelings for his ex

Does he call you 'babe' too?
I'm not saying what I call my exes as a moderator may be lurking.....
Remember, Babe is a pig ;-)
ex's know their way to past lovers

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