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Jokes2 mins ago
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.You are in luck here. There used to be nothing except Kaliber which was at one time awful, but is now good. There are also low-alcohol beers from Becks and Holsten which are excellent. Sainsbury's do their own low-alcohol German lager as well and stock all the others I have mentioned. I tried them for 4 days but went back to trusty Bud.
You could also try tomato juice with Worcester sauce (has to be Lea and Perrins) with loads of extra-hot Tabasco or Encona or the like - give it a kick.
Germans keep the best German red wine for themselves (quite rightly) so fill your boots, it is fairly neutral for dietary purposes. Failing that, any distilled spirit @ 40% ish plus a zero calorie mixer (diet pop or plain water). Don't do the wine and coke mix in Bavaria, it should be a criminal offence.
Wheat beer is about 1000 calories a pint, so is not dissimilar to eating a large chocolate cake every hour. Sadly.
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