Body & Soul0 min ago
Judy Finnigan
When I saw the headlines this morning I had a sharp intake of breath - surely a woman wouldn't 'excuse' rape?
However, having now seen a transcript, what she actually said was (lifted from the BBC website);
"If he does go back, he will have to brave an awful lot of comments," said Finnigan during her debut appearance on the lunchtime programme.
"But, having said that, he has served his time, he's served two years.
"The rape - and I am not, please, by any means minimising any kind of rape - but the rape was not violent, he didn't cause any bodily harm to the person.
"It was unpleasant, in a hotel room I believe, and she [the victim] had far too much to drink.
"That is reprehensible but he has been convicted and he has served his time."
Ultimately she's right, isn't she?
As unpleasant as this man is, he has served his time, and therefore shouldn't he be allowed to continue to pursure his chosen career?
However, having now seen a transcript, what she actually said was (lifted from the BBC website);
"If he does go back, he will have to brave an awful lot of comments," said Finnigan during her debut appearance on the lunchtime programme.
"But, having said that, he has served his time, he's served two years.
"The rape - and I am not, please, by any means minimising any kind of rape - but the rape was not violent, he didn't cause any bodily harm to the person.
"It was unpleasant, in a hotel room I believe, and she [the victim] had far too much to drink.
"That is reprehensible but he has been convicted and he has served his time."
Ultimately she's right, isn't she?
As unpleasant as this man is, he has served his time, and therefore shouldn't he be allowed to continue to pursure his chosen career?
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But, Minty....if I ended up drunk in a hotel room with x or y or z I could be raped because the man wanted to rape me...
If I ended up drunk in a hotel room with say...Andy...I would be safe and looked after til I sobered my silly self up.....unless of course Mrs Andy turned up....☺
Be well and take care...x
If I ended up drunk in a hotel room with say...Andy...I would be safe and looked after til I sobered my silly self up.....unless of course Mrs Andy turned up....☺
Be well and take care...x
I'm thinking there are a lot of other ABers who are reading this long long thread and choosing for one reason or another not to join in and I don't blame them. I just wanted to say I found kval's analogy perfectly understandable and a good one in the 'degrees' of rape. I expect plenty of others understand it too and the point it demonstrates.
On a pedantic note in my book two possible answers is not multiple choice it's either or.
On a pedantic note in my book two possible answers is not multiple choice it's either or.
gness - "But, Minty....if I ended up drunk in a hotel room with x or y or z I could be raped because the man wanted to rape me...
If I ended up drunk in a hotel room with say...Andy...I would be safe and looked after til I sobered my silly self up.....unless of course Mrs Andy turned up....☺"
This is the crux of the argument I have been putting forward for the last couple of days.
There is a school of thought among some AB'ers that if a woman puts herself in, shall we say, certain situations, then that in some way includes her in the responsibility of her assault, regrettable though everyone agrees it is.
My point is, there is no automatic 'get into bed free' card issued because a woman enters a man's hotel room.
I personally would not engage in any activity with any woman if she was drunk that I was not one hundred per cent sure she would do with equal enthusiasm if she were sober.
Obviously, if my aquaintance with her is a few hours only - I would not feel it my sworn duty as a man to 'have a go because it's rude not to when she's turned up here ...' which seems to be almost the accepted scenario for some posters on this thread.
My point is, if a woman is saying no, or by default of inconciousness not saying yes, then the right to sexual abuse should not be assumed by the man who happens to be there.
It's not automatic.
A man has to make a concious deicison to rape a woman - he's not a jack-in-the-box - flip the catch and off he goes.
We are talking a serious sexual assault of a woman unable to give or deny consent, and the advantage taken of her by a virtual stranger, and what i find more disturbing, the perception that she was at least partly responsible, of not directly to balme, as a result of her actions.
It simply does not work like that.
If I am walking down the street, and an old lady falls over in front of me, and her purse spills her money all over the pavvement, does that give me the right to help myself to her cash because she is too dazed to say no?
We are a civilised society. I have never, and will never accept that men will 'take advantage if its offered ...' and the way around that is not to be with a man you don't know.
It is incumbent on any man to assess a situation, and realise that such behaviour is not only unaccetpable, it is a criminal offence.
And no, a woman is not 'partly to blame ...' because she has gone to a room with a man she barely knows.
Women are entitled to respect, consideration and protection wherever they are, whomever they are with, and whatever state they are in when the get there.
If I ended up drunk in a hotel room with say...Andy...I would be safe and looked after til I sobered my silly self up.....unless of course Mrs Andy turned up....☺"
This is the crux of the argument I have been putting forward for the last couple of days.
There is a school of thought among some AB'ers that if a woman puts herself in, shall we say, certain situations, then that in some way includes her in the responsibility of her assault, regrettable though everyone agrees it is.
My point is, there is no automatic 'get into bed free' card issued because a woman enters a man's hotel room.
I personally would not engage in any activity with any woman if she was drunk that I was not one hundred per cent sure she would do with equal enthusiasm if she were sober.
Obviously, if my aquaintance with her is a few hours only - I would not feel it my sworn duty as a man to 'have a go because it's rude not to when she's turned up here ...' which seems to be almost the accepted scenario for some posters on this thread.
My point is, if a woman is saying no, or by default of inconciousness not saying yes, then the right to sexual abuse should not be assumed by the man who happens to be there.
It's not automatic.
A man has to make a concious deicison to rape a woman - he's not a jack-in-the-box - flip the catch and off he goes.
We are talking a serious sexual assault of a woman unable to give or deny consent, and the advantage taken of her by a virtual stranger, and what i find more disturbing, the perception that she was at least partly responsible, of not directly to balme, as a result of her actions.
It simply does not work like that.
If I am walking down the street, and an old lady falls over in front of me, and her purse spills her money all over the pavvement, does that give me the right to help myself to her cash because she is too dazed to say no?
We are a civilised society. I have never, and will never accept that men will 'take advantage if its offered ...' and the way around that is not to be with a man you don't know.
It is incumbent on any man to assess a situation, and realise that such behaviour is not only unaccetpable, it is a criminal offence.
And no, a woman is not 'partly to blame ...' because she has gone to a room with a man she barely knows.
Women are entitled to respect, consideration and protection wherever they are, whomever they are with, and whatever state they are in when the get there.
Eccles ...my school of thought..Andy you are a gent...no is no is no and is wrong..however it would be very naive to think, having placed herself in ths regretable position, she would then say ..yes..but I dont fancy your mate much ! she was a very silly girl and has hopefully learned a very hard and public lesson in life....
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