Spare The Rod And Spoil The Child?

[sandyRoe]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-68827782.amp

I was regularly beaten when I was little.  When particularly naughty my feet were sometimes held to the fire.

That never done me any harm.

[barney4444]

Is there something wrong with you mentally sandy, your parents should have been prosecuted, and to come out with such a ridiculous statement, I can assure you it did you a lot of harm.

[retrocop]

                                                                                     

//That never done me any harm.///

I assume that was very much T.I.C. remark. From what you have told us of your history I reckon it has done you some harm.

My father was a bully and a tyrant to both me and my mother. I am sure the frequent very hard slaps around my ear with drum damage was the cause of my premature deafness.

[ToraToraTora]

Feet held to the fire? gawd sounds like Tom Browns school days!

[bhg481]

There is a marked difference between smacking and beating.

[barney4444]

No there ain't, if you smack me it's assault, so how does smacking a 8 year become o.k.  

[Barsel]

My Mum never smacked me but my Dad did smack me once when I gave him cheek and he was drunk.

He was sorry straight away, but I will never forget that occasion.

[andy-hughes]

barney - // No there ain't, if you smack me it's assault, so how does smacking a 8 year become o.k. //

I don't think there is a one-size-fits-all approach to discipline.

My daughters were all very different - the oldest would take you to the limit shen she got going, the youngest only needed a sideways look to have her bursting into tears.

But I think that, with a small child, a toddler, when reasoning is not going to work, then a light tap on the bottom enforces the message. 

I would never condone sustained smacking, or making a child live in fear of being hit, but you have to be proportionate in anything to do with children.

Where modern society is increasingly failing itself, is deciding on a viewpoint, and then acting as though absolutely everyone else sees that viewpoint in exactly the same way.

A three-year-old doesn't see a tap on the bottom as 'assault', or life-changing abuse, they forget in minutes.

By the time is past five or six, then other punishments are appropriate, and no child at or above that age should be smacked.

It's a difficult subject, but every parent knows themselves and their own child best, and you have to accept that their judgement is going to trump some Whitehall suit pronouncing about what everyone should do every day from now to eternity.

That's not how people work.

[ladybirder]

My mother used to keep a stick in an upstairs cupboard to beat me with.  When she wanted to beat me she would tell me to go and fetch the stick.  I'd say I couldn't find it or it wasn't there.  That earnt me a few extra strokes on my bare bottom.

[barney4444]

If you  advocating a light tap on the bottom to deter bad behaviour, we both know that unless the child worried about having another one it would not bother them at all, so the smack has to be of sufficient force to hurt, hitting someone is hitting someone, full stop, and it is absolutely indefensible to be trying to justify hitting children. 

[THECORBYLOON]

ANDY, "By the time is past five or six, then other punishments are appropriate, and no child at or above that age should be smacked."

Would you be in agreement if Parliament allowed punishment in England up to age six?

[THECORBYLOON]

For "punishment" read "skelping".

[naomi24]

Hitting children means the parent has lost control and that's poor parenting. 

[barney4444]

Hitting children means the parent has lost control and that's poor parenting. 

Not poor parenting, it's abuse.

[TwoShortPlanks]

It's assault, no matter how you try to dress it up as discipline.

We have laws to protect adults from being hit, why should we not protect children in the same way? 

[davebro3]

I was never smacked as a child - it should not be necessary or acceptable.

[ladybirder]

I didn't love my mother.  Neither did my brother, he loved me.

[naomi24]

That's really sad, LB.

[Barsel]

Punishment with the ruler or cane was used when I was at school.  I expect it isn't used these days, is it?

[andy-hughes]

Corby - I would be keen for the government to keep out of this issue entirely.