Daily Mail Reader

[number8]

Further to an earlier answer on a previous thread, what is an 'average Daily Mail reader'?

[slimjim]

My Nan! She laps it up and believes it all, e.g. hordes of immmigrants just across the Straits of Dover planning their assault, perverts on every street corner, burglars under your bed, etc, etc.

[WaldoMcFroog]

Want to call it a "whiteboard", have you ever heard anything so outrageous, young children running amuk smoking ecstasy, having sex with each other, not like in my day, you could leave your front door open, of course, I blame the blacks/gays/working class, not that you can say that these days, they'll call you a racist/ homophobe/ tory, Britain under Churchill was the best we ever had, the sound of leather on willow, other mythical notions that didn't actually exist, the Germans all steal our sun loungers, and that's because they're all really Nazis at heart, pop music today is rubbish (*may have a point there, actually*), bring back hanging, except for that nice Lee Clegg boy, the unemployed are just lazy and don't want a job, anyone who is the slightest bit different must be hunted down and killed and lets not forget fox hunting, which along with witch dunking, is a perfectly natural country pursuit and should be allowed and anyway, foxes like it, it doesn't hurt them.

[bobbobley]

WaldoMcFroog I do believe you have just posted the funniest answer to a question I have ever seen on this site and the thing is its entirely accurate! I almost fell off my seat laughing.

I was going to write right-wing racist middle-english xenophobes as the response but your answer was way more succinct.

[WaldoMcFroog]

"Succint"? Hardly! But glad you enjoyed it!

[IndieSinger]

Also, Daily Mail readers don't eat or drink anything (apart from non-GM organic produce) because categorically EVERY foodstuff and liquid ever invented gives you cancer/heart disease/blood clots/rots your liver/severs your leg/castrates your privates/takes away your first-born.

Co-incidentally, the exact same products increase longevity/give you a healthy heart/increase your sex-drive and stamina/improve your eyesight/bring your grandmother back to life.

Furthermore, each one of these is a Scandelous Four-Page Report.

And it's still the fault of the blacks/gays/nurses/government/teenagers/asians.


News just in: non-GM and Organic food is no longer good for you. Scandalous. (Four-Page Health Special Report starting on page 27).

In your Daily Mail tomorrow: The startling scientific evidence that Organic and non-GM food puts and end to world poverty.

[secretspirit]

None of that's true. If you read it you'd know what it said, or are you too busy dodging the immigration system and not learning English to read it (JOKE). Seriously, I love the DM.

[Janetex]

What's that terrorist hotline number again?

[IndieSinger]

secretspirit I read it every single day as it is the only English newspaper available here.

[betwilm]

Hmmm I'm not naming any names but a certain someone I know is always quoting from the Mail, e.g. "I read in the paper that chocolate ruins your eyes" or similar! ;) Aside from that, it's the only newspaper I like to read.

[Tat]

IndieSinger - what about the European Guardian? best paper ever! xx

[vittoria]

I once had to write an assignment for a course I was doing which involved comparing the way a piece of news was presented by different newspapers. I rang the Daily Mail and asked how they analised their readership. I can't remember the actual figures now but they said that the majority of their readership was ABC1. I however suspected (I had my reasons but I can't remember as it was 1997) that the largest group was C1, with AB trailing behind; but they chose to give the figures lumped in this way because they wanted to make it look like the paper sold across the spectrum.

[poadster]

The question"what is an 'average Daily Mail reader'? The answer - "Thick"

[randy]

Want to call it a "whiteboard", my apologies for mentioning this earlier it was just a sound off I have three black lovely children and I love them soooo much WaldoMcFroog Tue 27/4/2004