Old joke
With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America this might be some good advice.
For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks.
Watch for these consolidations in later this year:
1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. Will merge and become:
Hale Mary Fuller Grace
2. Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become:
Poly Warner Cracker
3. 3M will merge with Goodyear and become:
MMMGood
4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become:
ZipAudiDoDa
5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become:
FedUp
6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
Fairwell Honeychild
7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become:
PouponPants
8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become:
Knott NOW!
9. John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become
Deere Abi.
10. Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become
Honey I'm Home.
11. Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become
Mine All Mine..
12. Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing reproductive organs.
13. 3M, J.C. Penney and the Canadian Opera Company will merge and become 3 Penney Opera.