A Yorkshire Drug Problem

[mrs_overall]

Police have reported that in Yorkshire, regular users of Ecstasy have started to inject themselves in the mouth with the drug.
The practice is known as "E By Gum"

[Baldric]

Made me lol.
;o)

[tonyav]

Groan, lol

[bookbinder]

Well, Ah'll go t'fooit of our stairs!

[marval]

lol

[marval]

A man goes to the vet because his cat is poorly.

The vet says "Is it a tom?" and the man says "Nay lad, 'ah've got it 'ere in t'basket!"

[mrs_overall]

lol Marval!

[marval]

Thanks Mrs O, here is another one.

A couple are playing 'I spy' in the kitchen of their home somewhere in Yorkshire.

'I spy with my little eye something beginning with T' said the husband.

"Tea pot said the wife." 'Nay Lass!'

"Tea towel." 'Nay Lass!'

"Toaster." 'Nay Lass!' he said, drumming his fingers on the work top.

"Oh I don't know" she said at long last "I give in"

'It's easy' he said. 'It's t'oven!'

[seadogg]

Well, tha' cannot get through't hide of a Yorkshireman tha noes so it as te be t'gob.

[mrs_overall]

You could almost be from Yorkshire marval!

(That's a compliment BTW, not an insult lol)

[marval]

No, but my Dad was, and I used to live and work there.

[mrs_overall]

seadogg - aye lad, tha's reet abaht that

[Jemisa]

Mrs O! Groan...

jem

[Sqad]

Greater Manchester (Wigan) equivalent.

Took a girl or a drink and she said "I can't go in that pub av been banned fu fartin"

"They can't ban you for farting i replied"

"They can, I was farten wid landlord"

Get it?

[marval]

Yorkshireman:I'd like to buy a ring

Jeweller:Wedding or engagement?

Yorkshireman:Wedding

Jeweller:Gold or silver?

Yorkshireman:Gold

Jeweller:White gold or yellow gold?

Yorkshireman:Yellow

Jeweller:Eighteen carat?

Yorkshireman:Na, I've got some toffee stuck to me teeth

[DTCwordfan]

What does a Betty's of Harrogate tearoom teapot say to it's lover?

O, dajarling!

[marval]

At the eventual passing of the eldest Nun in the Convent, the remainder of the members decided that a special headstone was required for such a devout person.

After much deliberation the inscription "God, she is thine" was agreed upon and the local Yorkshire stonemason duly instructed.

The day before the ceremony the stone was delivered to the local church, on closer inspection the Nuns were horrified to find a mistake, as the inscription read "God, she is thin".

The stonemason was telephoned immediately, informed that "you have missed out the 'E'", and asked to rectify the fault post haste as the memorial was required the next day.

The stone was collected by the stonemason forthwith and re-delivered later that day having been duly corrected.

The headstone now reading "e' God, she is thin".

[mrs_overall]

lol

[DTCwordfan]

What do you call a pie on top of Barnsley town hall clock?

something ta eight

[marval]

Bloke from Barnsley with a sore backside asks chemist "Nah then lad, does tha sell a**e cream?"

Chemist replies "Aye, Magnum or Cornetto?"

[mrs_overall]

<<<groan @ DT>>>>>>