ChatterBank10 mins ago
The Scottish Jew.
An elderly Scottish Jew has decided to take it a little easier and take up golf, so he puts his name down at the local club. After a week he receives a message that his application has been turned down. So he goes down to the club to inquire why.
Secretary: You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club
Scot: Aye but I am as Scottish as you are, Jock.
Secretary: This means that on formal occasions we wear kilts..
Scot: Aye, so do I.
Secretary: You are aware that we wear nothing under our kilts
Scot: Neither do I.
Secretary: But you are a Jew
Scot: Aye, I be that.
Secretary: So you are circumcised
Scot: Aye, I be that too.
Secretary: I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel comfortable with that.
Scot: Ach, away with ya, man. I know that you have to be a Protestant to march with the Orangemen. And I know that you have to be a Catholic to become a Knight of Saint Columbus. But this is the first time I heard that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club.
Secretary: You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club
Scot: Aye but I am as Scottish as you are, Jock.
Secretary: This means that on formal occasions we wear kilts..
Scot: Aye, so do I.
Secretary: You are aware that we wear nothing under our kilts
Scot: Neither do I.
Secretary: But you are a Jew
Scot: Aye, I be that.
Secretary: So you are circumcised
Scot: Aye, I be that too.
Secretary: I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel comfortable with that.
Scot: Ach, away with ya, man. I know that you have to be a Protestant to march with the Orangemen. And I know that you have to be a Catholic to become a Knight of Saint Columbus. But this is the first time I heard that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club.
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