Men

[starone]

1. Men are like Laxatives - they irritate the crap out of you.

2. Men are like Bananas - the older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like Weather - nothing can be done to change them.

4. Men are like Blenders - you need one, but you're not quite sure why.

5. Men are like Chocolate Bars - sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like Commercials - you can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like Department Stores - their clothes are always 1/2% off!

8. Men are like Government Bonds - they take soooooooo long to mature.

9. Men are like Mascara - they usually run at the first sign of emotion.

10. Men are like Popcorn - they satisfy you, but only for a little while.

11. Men are like Snowstorms - you never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

12. Men are like Lava Lamps - fun to look at, but not very bright.

13. Men are like Parking Spots - all the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

Now send this to all the remarkable women you know, as well as to any understanding good-natured, fun kinda guys you might be lucky enough to know !!!!!!!!!!

[madiba]

And women like dog turds.
The older they get
The easier to pick up

[MarkRae]

> Now send this to all the...

Or, rather, don't - the Internet is already full of this type of spam crap...

[starone]

Good god Mark - it's only a joke, not true you know. Or perhaps you don't.

[Kiki-frog]

Very good, Star, made me laugh! Of course, one of the guys is going to retaliate.....

[Davethedog]

"Good god Mark - it's only a joke, not true you know. Or perhaps you don't"

If this had been posted by a man about women there would have been all sorts to pay. Chauvanistic, misogynistic etc.

All that equlity brings is the right for a woman to be misandric and of course should a man complain we have no sense of humour because "its only a joke"

[ummmm]

If it was said about women I would find it as funny, or not, as this one!

[MarkRae]

I wasn't commenting on the hilarity of the content, but merely advising people NOT to spam it to all their female acquaintances...

[Kiki-frog]

Oh dear....., here you go chaps, here's one for you:

Women are like guns, keep one around long enough and you're going to want to shoot her

[starone]

This isn't a joke - I have decided not to post any more jokes. There are too many adverse reactions just lately.

[ummmm]

What do you mean it's not a joke?

For a change a understand where Mark is coming from. Had you left the end bit off I doubt he would have commented.

[Kiki-frog]

Ummm, I think Star means she's serious about not posting any more jokes

[ummmm]

Oh.

[starone]

Got it in one kiki.

[maggiebee]

Don't let them put you off starry - I thought it was very funny and will pass on to female and male friends who like a laugh.

[Kiki-frog]

Star, I think it would be a shame to stop posting your jokes, as you've come up with some brilliant ones that have really brightened my day.

The problem with jokes is that there is nearly always someone or something who has to be the butt of them. People can laugh them off or get wound up - that's their choice.

[dickythecook]

Star, I agree with Kiki, keep on posting . Some of the jokes may a wee bit old and tired, but, having said that, so am I. I will post something that will draw the heat off you. dtc

[maggiebee]

The late great, Les Dawson made a good few bawbees telling mother-in-law jokes over the years, Yet to hear anyone saying they were offended. Men and women alike laughed their socks off.

[dickythecook]

Me and typos today..should read...some of the jokes may BE a wee bit

[Kiki-frog]

Glad you clarified that, Dicky. I thought you were saying that you were old and tired and sometimes jokes make you wee.