Tommy Cooper Gem..

[Patsy33]

A jump-lead walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman said, "I'll serve you this time, but start anything!"....

[Patsy33]

But DON'T start anything!

[Bazile]

Not funny if you have to correct
Not that it was funny in the first place

[weecalf]

Flat battery so did the barman show him the exite

[EDDIE51]

The original version was >>
A guy tries to get into a club but is told he has to be wearing a tie. He does not have one so he goes to his car , picks up the jump leads and ties them into a bow around his neck. He comes back to the bar and asks the doorkeeper if he can come in now. The reply is ''OK but don't start anything''

[Bazile]

Starship commander type of guy ?
What's that then?

[DTCwordfan]

in the mode, ""I was adopted at birth and have never met my mum. That makes it very difficult to enjoy any lapdance."

[Bazile]

Well that counts you out then

[piggynose]

tommy cooper wasn't a type of l bloke anybody cud impersonate. sorry folks but these quips dont do him any justice. they need to come from his mouth only, or they're not funnny.

[bhg481]

How on earth have Bazile and divebuddy managed to turn a joke thread into an acrimonious one?

[EDDIE51]

Yes Tommy had the act perfect. I remember him putting a policemans helmet on and saying ''Copper'' . Then he put a second police helmet on and said ''Tuppence'' Sounds like a very poor joke but the way he did it had the audience roaring with laughter.

[Togo]

A churlish post raises the hackles of some. Db is one, so am I.

[Bazile]

My comment was tongue in cheek _ u chose to take issue

[Patsy33]

Do you know any good jokes Bazile??

[Bazile]

U take unimportant things far 2 seriously , it would appear